


STUCK | 2YEON

by rainbowsubmarine



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Alternate Reality, F/F, mixed reality, reality mixed with imagination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:47:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 31,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26463637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowsubmarine/pseuds/rainbowsubmarine
Summary: Jeongyeon turned towards Nayeon. “I have imagined holding your hands so many times but now I find it difficult to do so, Nayeon. If I stay… if we stay, I’ll lose you more for sure. Things have changed so much, so fast, Nayeon. It’s time for us to end our story. I wish all the happiness for you even if that means I must sacrifice my own.”STUCK is all about Nayeon and Jeongyeon’s love story while being the members of the Nation’s Girl Group, TWICE.Will fame destroy their relationship or will they find a way to make it last forever?#2YEONonSTUCK
Relationships: Im Nayeon/Yoo Jeongyeon
Comments: 25
Kudos: 44





	1. love can color us

**Author's Note:**

> I combined my imagination and mixed reality as I write this fiction.
> 
> A lot of scenarios included in this story happened to 2yeon and other members of TWICE in real life.
> 
> It would be my pleasure if you find those real events of TWICE that I incorporated in this fiction.
> 
> Will you be able to tell what’s real and reel in the story? Please find it out and let me know!
> 
> PS. I will be posting 3 chapters every Tuesday. There are a total of 15 short chapters in this fiction.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> #2YEONonSTUCK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Love can color us.” Nayeon read.
> 
> “Happy birthday, Nayeon. Sorry, it took me a few days.” Jeongyeon said while scratching the back of her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trouvaille  
> (n.) something or someone lovely discovered by chance; a lucky find;

Nayeon and Jeongyeon failed.

They failed to debut as 6MIX. The original plan was Jeongyeon, Nayeon, Jihyo, Minyoung, Lena and Cecilia would debut as the new girl group of JYP Entertainment.

But it was late in the afternoon when Mr. Park Jin Young himself called an emergency meeting to reveal the news among the girls.

After the heart-breaking, body shattering, soul crushing, whatever-you-call-it news, Nayeon and Jeongyeon decided to visit one of their favorite places to let their hearts out – the Seoul Forest.

The Seoul Forest is a 42-minute drive from JYP Entertainment building which is very convenient for Nayeon and Jeongyeon to visit any time they want or need or really, whatever circumstances it may be.

It is one of the largest parks in Seoul City where lots of citizens and tourists can breathe the refreshing air offered by nature and with over 400,000 trees and 100 different animals. This ecologic park also offers visitors the opportunity to stroll along the river while admiring the colorful and intoxicating flowers along the way.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon didn’t mind even if the park was typically jam-packed especially during the day. They had been in the park so many times that they already knew a place to avoid the crowd and just enjoy the breath-taking view of nature.

Jeongyeon remembered, it was past midnight when Nayeon called to accompany her in the park.

Nayeon specifically ordered Jeongyeon to wear a black trousers, black hoodie and black shoes. And though very much confused as to why Nayeon wanted to visit the park untimely and the dress code, Jeongyeon – being constantly acquiescent to Nayeon and Nayeon being constantly spontaneous – agreed.

Apparently, Nayeon wanted to show Jeongyeon the “spot” she accidentally discovered while absent mindedly roaming the park.

Nayeon was very eager back then, not very concerned of the possibilities of the getting caught and being reported to the authorities from the way they sneaked in through the guards roving around the park.

At that point Jeongyeon subsequently understood the dress code. It was to guarantee their incognito and ninja skills from the guards.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon were silently navigating through the Insect and Butterfly Garden, hand in hand, when Nayeon accidentally kicked away her shoe.

“Yah! That’s what happens when you don’t tuck your shoes properly! Why do you always wear your shoes that way even to life and death situations?” Jeongyeon shouted in a whisper.

“Don’t shout at me! The guards might hear us!” Nayeon shouted back in a whisper while wearing her shoe again.

“I swear to God, I should've not come with you.”

“Shut up and just take my hand, Jeongyeon.”

After making their way through the guards, Nayeon swiftly pulled Jeongyeon into what seemed like a narrow passageway covered with thick bushes above and on each side. They had to walk while lowering their bodies to see what’s inside the narrow passageway of wintergreen boxwoods.

Jeongyeon then understood why Nayeon was very willing to risk their life just to see the place.

The “spot” was like a small, rounded and private secret garden with nothing but a wooden bench positioned perfectly at the center and with an enormous cherry blossom tree beside.

It was like a hideout where the picturesque Seongsu Bridge and beautiful panoramic view of Apgujeong-dong could be seen from the other side of the Han River.

How did Nayeon absent minded end up here? Exactly, she’s Nayeon, the Im Nayeon. She could end up anywhere unusual.

Seongsu Bridge’s lights and the moon itself were enough to pass through the ray of lights from the cherry blossom tree to the bench of the “spot” where Nayeon and Jeongyeon settled. No words were said from them, they understood that the best thing to do was to enjoy the horizon – still hand in hand.

Tonight, even consistently hand in hand, was a different story though.

“Do we deserve this, Yoo Jeongyeon?” Nayeon inhaled through her runny nose. She’s been crying for hours since the announcement of Mr. Park.

Poor, Nayeon. Jeongyeon wanted to cry too. But she needed to be the stronger one or else they would both fall apart.

“No, baby.” Jeongyeon answered her girlfriend honestly. “You’ve been working very hard for this. All of us do especially Jihyo. For God sake, she’s been training for almost 10 years. But… I’d like to believe that Mr. Park has a better plan for us all. I guess through SIXTEEN, fans will be able to know us better and we can truly showcase our talents. It’s just a minor setback if you ask me, baby. We will debut no matter and I promise you we will debut together.” Jeongyeon said while wiping Nayeon tears and kissing her hand.

Nayeon sighed, “I’m so devastated, especially for Jihyo. My heart is breaking for her. She’s so ready to conquer the stage where she belongs. But maybe… you’re right, this is just a minor set-back. No matter what happens we will debut together and that’s more important. Right?”

Jeongyeon nooded.

Finally, Jeongyeon could see a small smile from Nayeon. Jeongyeon was contented that she could lighten up the mood of her girlfriend easily.

“And besides you look ugly when you cry. Like, really really ugly. I bet your eyes will be puffy and your face will be bloated tomorrow.”

“Yah. You should be comforting me right now instead of saying those things.” Nayeon whined and smacked Jeongyeon’s arm.

Jeongyeon is not the typical type of girlfriend who usually shows affection to her significant other.

“But to make you feel really better, how about I treat you dinner at Jungsik? I need to make sure you eat well, Nayeon. Coz this will all pass.”

But she always makes sure to show her affection in other ways she can.

Jeongyeon smiled – the lopsided one.

Nayeon confessed that her biggest weakness was Jeongyeon’s lopsided smile but Jeongyeon thought so otherwise. It was the other way around. Nayeon’s bunny teeth, smile and aeygo were Jeongyeon’s favorite but as usual, Jeongyeon would never let Nayeon know.

Nayeon’s mood changed drastically and looked through Jeongyeon’s eyes.

“Why are you looking at me like that? Aren’t you hungry? Does anything hurt? Do you feel sick? Tell me.” Jeongyeon was very concerned while checking her girlfriend’s temperature.

“I can’t live without you, Yoo Jeongyeon.” Nayeon uttered. “I know I’m not a perfect girlfriend for you. Sometimes I get too demanding and moody. I worry a lot. Sometimes, I act like a kid. I feel insecure and I feel I’m not good enough. Sometimes… no, most of the time, I feel that I don’t deserve someone like you coz you’re too perfect for me. But… but know that my heart is yours, Yoo Jeongyeon. Always. Whether we debut now or not. Whether we became the Nation’s Girl Group or not. Whether we flop this or not. Whether we do concerts around the world or not even one. Whether...”

“Shhh, baby.” Jeongyeon placed her index finger on Nayeon’s lips to stop her from doubts and fears.

Jeongyeon embraced her tight. “Don’t think about the future too much. We will make this together. And my heart is yours too, Nayeon. Always. I know it will be difficult for us to hide our relationship after making a debut, but I want you to know that nothing will ever change between you and me. I will always be your Yoo Jeongyeon. I promise you that. I love you, Nayeon.”

“I love you too, Yoo Jeongyeon, with all of me.” Nayeon broke the hug, held Jeongyeon’s face with her both delicate hands and kissed Jeongyeon on the lips. Their foreheads connected.

“I’m glad I said yes to you a few weeks after courting me back then. Thank you for loving someone like me for almost five years now, Yoo Jeongyeon.”

*****

Jeongyeon and Nayeon met on September 15, 2010 and fell in love with each other instantly.

It was the day when Nayeon first met Jeongyeon when she entered the room where Jeongyeon was practicing Saxophone.

Nayeon was drawn by the music playing inside the practice room, so she quietly peaked inside. But Jeongyeon, who’s very much concentrating, got distracted from the noise of the creaking door, nonetheless.

The first thing that Nayeon thought of Jeongyeon was that she couldn’t believe a girl like Jeongyeon could be handsome and beautiful at the same time.

Glossy figure in an oversized red hoodie and denim blue shorts matched with black rubber shoes, short golden-brown hair, small sized face with pouting lips, dainty nose and pairs of arched eyebrows and sweeping eyelashes of her almond shaped eyes – a perfect girl crush image.

But Jeongyeon was really annoyed that time, for God sake, she’s been practicing all day, of course she’s exhausted. So, she made sure to send Nayeon daggers and Nayeon was obviously affected by it. She was afraid of Jeongyeon but tried to hide it with her smile – her signature bunny smile.

Jeongyeon approached Nayeon when the latter was caught staring or was it the other way around? Because after the daggers that she sent, Jeongyeon thought Nayeon was the most beautiful girl she ever laid eyes onto.

Sculpted figure in a light blue long sleeve paired with a denim blue short skirt and white shoes, long and shiny back hair, natural aegyo face with unique bunny teeth smile, high cheekbones, cute little nose and plump sweet lips, perfect eyebrows that matched the beautiful close set eyes with deep double eyelid – an overall ethereal beauty that was just too attractive for this world.

Jeongyeon didn’t know who’s looking at whom with so much affection but she knew, after approaching the girl with the ethereal beauty, she needed to court her instantly.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon probably didn’t have anything in common except for being both beautiful in their own ways but the two were inexplicably very compatible. Thus, became inseparable from the first day they met.

*****

Nayeon received a gift from Jeongyeon for her birthday. It was a late gift, since it took Jeongyeon a few days to finish whatever it was.

They were sitting in the exact place at the “spot” when Jeongyeon pulled out from her backpack what seemed to be rolled paper and hit it to Nayeon’s head.

“Ouch! What’s that for? Do you wanna die?!” Nayeon said while holding her head and getting the rolled paper from Jeongyeon.

“What’s this?”

“A birthday present.” Jeongyeon said casually.

Nayeon looked at her with wide eyes and open mouth. She’s obviously shocked with what Jeongyeon said.

“It’s okay if you don’t want it.” Jeongyeon tried to get the rolled paper back.

“Aniya! I was just surprised since you specifically told me not to expect something from you on my birthday. You’re such a liar.” Nayeon said and looked at the rolled paper smiling.

It was a plain white rolled paper inserted in a Chanel Coco Crush ring. And attached with it was a red tag.

“Love can color us.” Nayeon read.

“Happy birthday, Nayeon. Sorry, it took me a few days.” Jeongyeon said while scratching the back of her head.

“Thank you, Yoo Jeongyeon.” Nayeon briefly embraced Jeongyeon and gently removed the gold ring from the paper.

Jeongyeon held the ring for Nayeon and Nayeon started reading.

2010.10.15

LOVE LINE

I can’t control my trembling voice  
Even my reddening cheeks  
I can’t hide it  
I try to act cool but  
I can’t hide my heart  
I think I love you  
  
Your scent, your gestures  
Even the way you call my name  
You’re like, oh like it  
Now please know my heart, my girl oh  
  
I want you  
I secretly think about you all day  
I wanna walk with you

On our love line  
With our hands held  
Tell me you feel the same way  
With you  
I’m loving loving loving loving  
Loving that love line  
  
When I close my eyes, it gets clearer  
I look at you and I still miss you  
Do you know my heart?  
I want to be pulled, don’t let go of this line  
So we can fall more into the pink light  
Fill up my heart  
  
Your scent, your gestures  
Even the way you call my name  
You’re like, oh like it  
Now please know my heart, my girl oh  
  
I want you  
I secretly think about you all day  
I wanna walk with you  
On our love line  
With our hands held  
Tell me you feel the same way  
With you  
I’m loving loving loving loving  
Loving that love line  
  
Love line Love line  
Look into my eyes and tell me  
Love line Love line  
Don’t let go of my hand My baby  
Look into my eyes and tell me  
Love line Love line  
So love can color us  
  
Under the same sky  
Let’s look at the same place  
If I’m with you  
I can do it  
  
I wanna love I wanna love love  
Now look at me  
I wanna love I wanna love love  
Whisper in my ears  
  
I want you  
I secretly think about you all day  
I wanna only look at you  
Don’t hesitate, hold me  
On our love line  
With our hands held  
Tell me you feel the same way  
With you  
I’m loving loving loving loving  
Loving that love line  
  
Love line Love line  
Look into my eyes and tell me  
Love line Love line  
Don’t let go of my hand My baby  
Look into my eyes and tell me  
Love line Love line  
So love can color us

It was a song written by Jeongyeon for Nayeon.

After reading the lyrics, Nayeon looked at Jeongyeon with pure bliss.

“This is beautiful. Thank you, Yoo Jeongyeon. Really. Thank you for everything.”

“Saranghaeyo, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon uttered and inserted the ring to Nayeon. For the first time in her life, Jeongyeon admitted what she felt for Nayeon.

Again, Nayeon looked at Jeongyeon’s eyes. This time there’s something more about the way Nayeon looked at her. Nayeon was able to convey what she felt inside. Jeongyeon understood that Nayeon felt the same way. They both knew that whatever was happening between them, it was mutual.

“Nado Saranghaeyo, Yoo Jeongyeon.” Nayeon replied and embraced Jeongyeon but this time, longer.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon’s embrace was warm and their arms seemed to be protective for each other.

They had everything they wanted and needed right there.

This was the love they waited for and prayed for.

The world around them melted away as they embraced each other not wanting the moment to end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “You’re by my side  
> That’s more than enough  
> My heart is at peace  
> Every time I breathe  
> I want to place you softly in my arms
> 
> Look into my eyes  
> I’ll only show you everything  
> The world reflected in my eyes  
> So it can be in your pretty heart forever  
> In the same time  
> Just you and me  
> I’ll embrace you”  
> \- You in my heart


	2. you are number one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You are number one. You are my number one, Nayeon. Always remember that.” Jeongyeon kept repeating, hoping that Nayeon’s pain would go away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> nepenthe  
> (n.) something or someone that can make you forget your grief and suffering;

SIXTEEN happened.

JYP Entertainment announced that there would be sixteen contestants divided into two groups, the Major and the Minor.

It was late in the evening when Nayeon and Jeongyeon went to Love Line after they finished shooting the first episode of SIXTEEN.

Apparently, Nayeon renamed the “spot” to Love Line.

“Jeongyeon, I’m scared. I don’t want to be included in the Major without you.” Nayeon said, doubting herself again.

“Don’t be like that, Nayeon. Remember what they told us during the show? Majors will be treated like true JYPE artists. You will be living in a nice dorm, will be having your van as a service, you will be able to practice well, and you will be receiving guidance from our sunbaenim. You just must be consistent to stay in the Major. Don’t worry about me. I’ll just do better next time. I sucked at sax.” Jeongyeon chuckled at her pun hoping to lighten up the girlfriend’s mood.

“What if I fail even with those advantages? I don’t want to do missions without you.” Nayeon said while clinging onto Jeongyeon’s arms.

“You’re such a baby.” Jeogyeon chuckled more. “Nayeon, you are number one. Always remember that. It’s okay if we have different missions because behind the camera, behind all of these, you will always find me there supporting and cheering for you.” Jeongyeon uttered and intertwined Nayeon’s hand.

*****

Time passed by quickly as Jeongyeon and Nayeon shot the next episodes of SIXTEEN. It was emotionally draining to be honest. It was like a roller coaster ride. Even if both do their best, they sometimes tend to be in the bottom group.

Nayeon was interviewed regarding being in the Minor. Jeongyeon was standing behind the camera looking at her girlfriend who’s trying to stop herself from crying.

Jeongyeon couldn’t help but feel hurt for her girlfriend too.

For Jeongyeon, Nayeon was someone deserving to stay in the Major. When there was something to be done, Nayeon’s determination was strong and she would only focus on that task.

“At first when I went down, I still felt Minor was comfortable because Jeongyeon was there. But still it’s so different. I’m annoyed.” Nayeon laughed trying to hide her feelings.

Jeongyeon knew her girl too well, she would be crying all night long later.

After Nayeon's interview, the Minors went inside the bus.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon were seated beside each other but they knew the camera would still be shooting them until they arrived at the dorm so Jeongyeon, with all her might, prevented herself from comforting her disappointed baby.

“I cleaned the whole Major dorm today. I did all the dishes too in the morning.” Nayeon said, obviously regretting what she did.

“It’s okay. You will be back in the Majors before you know it, Nayeonunnie. You’re really good at everything.” Mina uttered as if reading Jeongyeon’s mind.

Nayeon smiled, feeling relief that aside from Jeonyeon, someone was rooting for her and believing to her talents.

After the shoot, Jeongyeon took the chance to intertwine her hands with Nayeon.

In all honesty, both didn’t know if other contestants knew about what’s between them. Nayeon, being herself, didn’t really try to hide it in front of others unless they were in front of the camera. No one dared to ask them, nevertheless.

“Jeongyeon, do you still experience nightmares when you sleep?” Jeongyeon wondered why Nayeon asked.

“Yes. I had it the last time. I don’t know why it keeps coming back whenever I sleep without you. I’m just glad Mina was there to wake me up.”

*****

When they arrived in the Minor dorm from the first episode, the girls were given a chance to choose a fellow contestant to be their roommate. And since Jeongyeon and Mina knew each other way back then, both decided to be roommates.

Jeongyeon met Mina last year in the outstretched street of Apgujeong-ro near JYP Entertainment building.

It was 9:29 in the evening and Nayeon and Jihyo were still busy practicing their routine so Jeongyeon had to buy their dinner alone.

Mina looked lost that time. She was constantly looking at her phone and pacing back and forth pointing her feet outward like a penguin.

Jeongyeon knew she’s a new trainee by looking at her physique and the luggage sets beside her.

“Excuse me, Miss. Annyeong. Sorry to approach you but you look a bit lost. Is there anything I can do to help?” Jeongyeon asked. Honestly, it’s her habit and daily routine to help anyone in need.

“Konnichiwa. I’m sorry. I just arrived from Japan. I’m a new trainee of JYPE but I cannot contact my recruiter.” Mina said while holding what seemed to be a contact card.

“May I see?” Jeongyeon took the card. “Ah. You will not be able to contact him at this time. Not a chance. He usually conducts meetings with other recruiters, but it will be finished soon.” Jeongyeon returned the card.

Mina nodded, “I see. Thank you very much…?”, apparently waiting for the good Samaritan to tell her name.

“Oh, I’m sorry. It’s Jeongyeon. Yoo Jeongyeon.” Jeongyeon offered her hand and smiled.

Mina shook Jeongyeon's hand, “Thank you so much, Yoo Jeongyeon. I’m Myoui Mina. You can call me Mina.” Mina uttered and unconsciously stuck her tongue out.

When Jeongyeon was a new trainee, she had nobody to eat with, thus skipping all her dinner. She didn’t want Mina to experience the same, so they ended up eating together at Eslow Coffee Shop. It was Jeongyeon’s favorite bake shop where she formerly worked part-time.

Jeongyeon was the first one to welcome Mina in Korea and in the company and since then, Mina and Jeongyeon had become close friends.

*****

“How about we sleep together tonight? I’ll ask Mina to switch with me so you won’t experience any nightmares then.” Nayeon suggested. “Mina, is it okay with you?”

Jeongyeon knew Nayeon wanted to cuddle, not solely because of her episodes of nightmares but Nayeon needed Jeongyeon by her side.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon disagreed.

“No problem, Unnie. You can sleep with Jeongyeonunnie.” Mina, seemingly not happy, agreed with Nayeon.

“Thank you, Mina. I just really need Jeongyeon's suppport tonight.” Nayeon uttered.

And Jeongyeon was right, Nayeon cried all night long.

Nayeons’s chest raised and fell against Jeongyeon’s chest. Nayeon’s pain and disappointments came in waves. It came with minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses to regain her breath.

The noise coming from her echoed through the room and to Jeongyeon’s heart. Nayeon was trembling and crumbling. Her hands were clenching the sheets of their bed as if her world shattered to pieces.

Jeongyeon held her in silence, rocking her slowly as her own tears started to fall. If only she could find a solution to stop the pain.

“You are number one. You are my number one, Nayeon. Always remember that.” Jeongyeon kept repeating, hoping that Nayeon’s pain would go away. “You’ll be able to sleep well like you did before. You are number one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “How was your day today?  
> Anything bad happened?  
> You just need to get through  
> Day by day  
> Have strength, think of me
> 
> Baby think about me  
> All night long  
> We are together right now  
> In our dreams, it’s just us two  
> As we make our happy moments”  
> -Jaljayo, Good Night


	3. love comes in many colors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So, what’s your wish, Nayeon?” Jeongyeon asked while both were strolling on the streets of Dosan-daero in the middle of the night and after their simple yet memorable date.
> 
> Nayeon’s birthday wish was simple. She wanted Jeongyeon to tell five nice things about her and a piggyback ride going back to the dorm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yuanfen  
> (n.) when fate brings two people together that are made for each other;

Twice made their debut.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon made their debut – finally.

It’s been three months since Mr. Park Jin Young himself threw in a twist in the show, announcing that TWICE would be a nine-member group instead of the original plan of seven. He chose Tzuyu to join the group and surprised the audience by announcing that Momo, who was eliminated in the fourth mission, would be the final member of TWICE.

Jeongyeon and Nayeon were not surprised by this since Tzuyu, besides her stunning visuals and vocals, was the crowd favorite. And Momo was exceptional in dancing and performing.

Jeongyeon and Nayeon believed that Momo and Tzuyu would be a great addition to really complete TWICE.

Likewise, both were happy to see their best friend, Jihyo, finally made her much awaited debut. And though she’s not the oldest member of the group, Jihyo, with all her experiences during her long training years was later voted as the leader of TWICE.

On the other hand, Jeongyeon was thankful that other members thought of her as a potential leader. But Jihyo was the perfect leader for the group. She’s humble and hard working that’s why Nayeon and Jeongyeon voted for her.

Jeongyeon would never forget this day, October 20, 2015.

They finally made their debut with their first single "Like Ooh-Ahh". They had practiced nonstop for this debut song which was very special for Nayeon and Jeongyeon. So special that every time it was Jeongyeon’s part to sing, they would high five each other until it looked like a part of the choreography.

And even though Jeongyeon had a small part on their debut song, Jeongyeon being always confident and optimistic, didn’t mind. After all, it’s not like they would be singing that song forever.

TWICE was doing their first ever vlive countdown inside their dorm and all the members were having one of the greatest moments of their lives.

Nayeon was very cute wearing her pink pj’s partnered with the one-piece plushy hat that Jeongyeon won in the arcade when they went on a date during Nayeon’s birthday.

*****

“So, what’s your wish, Nayeon?” Jeongyeon asked while both were strolling on the streets of Dosan-daero in the middle of the night and after their simple yet memorable date.

Nayeon’s birthday wish was simple. She wanted Jeongyeon to tell five nice things about her and a piggyback ride going back to the dorm.

“Hmm. You cut your hair. You’re pretty.” Jeongyeon confessed and Nayeon couldn’t help but smile.

“That’s one.” Nayeon uttered and started counting through her fingers.

“Second one is that your eyes are pretty.”

“But I have lenses in.” Nayeon said with a straight face.

“And your teeth are pretty. Like xylitol candies.” Jeongyeon teased.

“I don’t think that’s right. You have two left.”

“And lastly.” Jeongyeon contemplated whether to tease her girlfriend again. “You are so cute.”

“Hmm!” Nayeon smacked Jeongyeon’s shoulder and both laughed.

The birthday girl obviously liked the moment. She was all smiles.

“You have one left.”

“One more left? Ugh. What should I say more? Is there anything more?” Jeongyeon asked herself.

“You always tell this to me.” Nayeon reminded.

“Really? What is it? Ah! You have big feet.” Jeongyeon teased.

“Anniyo.” Nayeon whined.

Of course, Jeongyeon knew what Nayeon was talking about. Every time Nayeon doubted herself or felt emotional, Jeongyeon would always tell it to her girlfriend.

“You are number one.” Jeongyeon finally uttered and Nayeon smiled.

Her smile was the prettiest thing Jeongyeon had ever seen in her life. For Nayeon’s smile always extended to her beautiful eyes and deep into Jeongyeon’s soul.

“Run faster, baby! Pali! Pali!” Nayeon shouted after climbing at Jeongyeon’s back.

“You are so heavy!” Jeongyeon yelled and ran on the street, fulfilling the girlfriend’s wish.

“Jeongyeon, let’s ride the roller coaster on my next birthday. I love speed.”

“No, you don’t.” Jeongyeon disagreed. “You are full of yourself, Nayeon.”

“Yah. I enjoy speed. I love roller coasters.”

“You’re even scared of fireworks.”

“Fireworks have nothing to do with speed! I’m just scared of fire!”

“Nope. You’re a scaredy cat. You’re kidding me.”

“I’m serious. I love speed.”

“You’re terrible at games.”

“That’s another story! That’s like apples and oranges. I just love speed.”

“I know you.”

“No, you don’t! What underwear am I wearing today?” Nayeon asked and both of them laughed.

Their laughs lighted their eyes like street lamps guiding their way back to the dorm. The way their lips lifted upward were also like rays of sunshine that could open up a spring flower.

It was a beautiful moment shared by the two.

Though both were not able to celebrate Nayeon’s birthday and their fifth anniversary that much because of their hectic schedule for the debut, the days spent with each other were always well spent.

*****

Nayeon and Jeongyeon intentionally did not sit beside each other during their vlive.

They were already used to doing this now to avoid any possibilities of scandal but sometimes Nayeon could really be obvious. Jeongyeon didn’t hate it though, in fact she loved it every time Nayeon showed her feelings since Jeongyeon was totally the opposite.

But as agreed by the two, the world doesn’t not need to know the truth between them.

TWICE were having fun and waiting for their debut song when Jeongyeon remembered her grandmother whom she lived with when she was young. She practically raised Jeongyeon up since both of her parents were busy working. Her grandmother really wanted to see Jeongyeon become a singer but, unfortunately, she passed away before Jeongyeon became one.

Jeongyeon couldn't help but cry in front of their growing fan views in vlive. Jeongyeon really tried her best to hide it with an eye patch cover when she felt Mina hugged her.

"Are you okay, Jeongyeonunnie?" Mina sounded very concerned.

Other members noticed it too. Nayeon held Jeongyeon’s head and Jihyo, being the best leader, transferred in front of Jeongyeon. Sana and Momo hugged her while Dahyun got tissues for her.

"Don't cry." All the girls said with concern.

Nayeon cried too. Jeongyeon didn't need to see her face to know her girlfriend’s crying.

Besides the fact that they went through a lot of hard work, Nayeon knew about Jeongyeon’s grandmother’s wish. Nayeon was also the favorite of Jeongyeon’s grandmother. It was Jeongyeon’s grandmother whom Nayeon and Jeongyeon felt that they could be who they really were and love whoever they wanted. She's the first person to know about their relationship. She's the protector, the guardian and the sanctuary of the both.

"Today, finally, TWICE made a debut. Thank you, fans who supported us, from SIXTEEN. Thank you very much. We will do our best. We will always remember this commitment. We will stay humble. Will you love TWICE much?!" Leader Jihyo shouted from which Jeongyeon gained the strength to talk.

"We will do our best. Love you." Jeongyeon said, not entirely sure if it was for the fans or for her grandmother.

"The showcase will be broadcast live at 8PM. Please check that out. Please check our song Like Ooh-Ahh. Please look forward to seeing us. This is TWICE." Jihyo continued. "Let's say goodbye. One two three."

"One in a million, you've been with us, TWICE! Thank you very much!" All of them said in unison.

After the vlive was cut off, Nayeon immediately hugged Jeongyeon. "I know what you're thinking, baby. Our grandmother is proud of you. I'm proud of you." Nayeon said and kissed Jeongyeon on the cheek. The latter responded by holding Nayeon’s arms.

The girls knew about their relationship now. It was revealed last two months ago, when TWICE went to Sanduri Beach. It was an arranged trip for them by the company to bond and know each other more before making a debut. They took a lot of pictures and videos while spending their time at the beach building up their friendship and creating new good memories.

They even went to the water with no extra set of clothes, Jeongyeon was the one who started it, and they all had fun, dancing, playing and splashing water with each other.

One of the activities that day was the open discussion wherein Nayeon and Jeongyeon confessed to them all. Tzuyu, the maknae, was the only one surprised though. Maybe she's too young to understand such a thing.

"Excuse me, Nayeon and Jeongyeon." Sadness Manager said while fixing her eyeglasses.

TWICE calls her Sadness Manager since she looks like the cartoon character, Sadness, from the movie Inside Out.

"Mr. Park called just now and wanted to have a meeting with you."

"It must be about the broadcast later. Let's prepare, girls!" Nayeon shouted.

"Actually, it's just you and Jeongyeon. Mr. Park wants to meet just the two of you." Sadness Manager uttered.

*****

Jeongyeon admitted that going inside Mr. Park Jin Young’s office was more terrifying than the last episode of SIXTEEN since this was the first time Mr. Park called her and Nayeon without the other members.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Park." Nayeon and Jeongyeon bowed in unison.

"Please take a seat." Mr. Park said in a very serious tone.

It took a few seconds before Mr. Park opened his mouth but it felt longer for Jeongyeon. "Do you know why I summoned the two of you?"

Nayeon and Jeongyeon with tongue tied and sealed lips just shook their heads.

"I'll talk directly to the point since I know you’ll be busy preparing for your broadcast later.” Mr. Park cleared his throat.

“I know you two are in a romantic relationship." Mr. Park paused and examined the stunned reaction of the two. "And I know you two are not even trying your best to hide it to your members. Not even to your managers, the staff and crews. Especially you, Nayeon. And so, because of that I want you two to..."

"We won't break up." Nayeon interjected and held Jeongyeon’s hand.

Nayeon's so dead right now, Jeongyeon thought. But knowing Nayeon, she would say whatever she had to say.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Park, but I won't break up with Yoo Jeongyeon. If you are concerned that it would affect our performance as members of TWICE, please don’t worry about it. Please understand that we will not end our relationship, Mr. Park." Nayeon stood up and bowed her head, still holding Jeongyeon’s hand.

How could Jeongyeon not love this girl with an ethereal beauty inside and out? A few months ago, she was crying because their debut was cancelled and now, she's behaving as if their relationship was the most important thing in the world. 

"Nayeon, do you know why I accepted you to this company?" Mr. Park Jin Young asked, signaling for Nayeon to sit down again. "Besides having a wide vocal range, exquisite physique and exceptional dance moves, it's because of your determination and passion. Both of you, do you remember what I said during SIXTEEN? I told you to show me why you are a star. But I never said to show me that you could sing or dance."

Both Nayeon and Jeongyeon were confused with what Mr. Park’s trying to say the fact that he just told them that he would be talking directly to the point.

"I'm not against your relationship.” Mr. Park uttered. “After all, we are also humans aside from being stars."

Mr. Park smiled, his eyes almost disappeared and formed a line.

"What?" Jeongyeon finally said a word.

"Love comes in many colors." Mr. Park Jin Young said, obviously referring to the pride flag. "You don't fall in love with the gender, but you fall in love with the person. You know, Nayeon and Jeongyeon, I believe that love is too beautiful to be hidden in the closet. I just want you two to be careful since not all, especially in this industry, especially in this country," Mr. Park Jin Young emphasized it, "will understand and accept your true colors."

Jeongyeon stood up and bowed her head to Mr. Park Jin Young after realizing what she heard. "Thank you very much, Mr. Park. Thank you for your understanding. Nayeon and I will do our best. We won't do anything to risk our group, our members and our company."

Nayeon bowed subsequently.

"Just promise me some things though." Mr. Park Jin Young paused. "Please do not make it obvious in front of your fans especially that you just made your debut. Please don’t let your hardships go to waste. Think of your members as well. Be the best unnies as much as possible. And Nayeon, I will be expecting from what you said a while ago. A promise is a promise. Same goes with you, Jeongyeon. Now hush and be prepared for your broadcast." Mr. Park Jin Young said and concentrated on his paperwork.

On their way out, Joengyeon grabbed Nayeon's arm and instantly embraced her.

"Thank you, Nayeon. You were so brave back there. I'm thankful and sorry to you for holding on to my hand." Jeongyeon sighed.

"Stop it, Jeongyeon." Nayeon reciprocated the embrace.

Her presence was warm, and arms were tight.

"There are many reasons but know that I can't live without you, Yoo Jeongyeon. You're always there for me. You're the one who's always holding my hand and I’m very much thankful for that.”

"Thank you, Nayeon. Let's be together forever." Jeongyeon uttered.

*****

Nayeon and Jeongyeon went back to the dorm and all the girls were concerned about the meeting the two had with Mr. Park Jin Young. 

“So, what happened to your meeting?” Jihyo asked. 

“Well... Mr. Park knows about our relationship.” Nayeon said. 

Even though Nayeon and Jeongyeon did not really try their best to hide their relationship, the girls were surprised. News really had wings and it could pass to anyone, including their superior. 

“Did he get mad, unnie?” Tzuyu asked. 

“No. He didn’t. In fact, he’s... supportive of it. He just reminded us to be cautious in front of our fans.” Jeongyeon said. 

“Really?! That’s good news, unnie!” Chaeyoung exclaimed. 

“I didn’t know Appa could be this open minded. Good for him!” Dahyun uttered.

“How about we celebrate tonight?” Momo suggested.

“Yes! That’s a good idea. Let’s celebrate our debut and of course, Nayeonunnie and Jeongyeon’s relationship!” Sana said and all the girls were fueled with excitement. 

Jihyo contemplated whether to agree with the girls. But she knew what they had been through before making the debut and celebrating would be a great chance for them to bond. Thus, she agreed.

Jihyo informed their managers regarding the planned celebration inside the dorm and subsequently, their managers agreed as well.

“Let’s buy some booze!” Jihyo exclaimed and the girls went wild. 

*****

The girls drinking session started right after their broadcast and it was a disaster starting to happen.

The girls were having fun singing the karaoke and drinking their booze except for the Royal Highness, who’s never really a fan of alcohol, Myoui Mina and Jeongyeon who designated herself as the guardian of the thirsty girls.

Though still minors, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu with the permission of Nayeon and Jihyo joined the drinking session without informing their managers. 

The girls were currently on their fourth bottle of tequila. Not to mention they had soju, white wine and red wine beforehand.

Mina, Chaeyoung and Tyuzu were busy enjoying the karaoke. And Momo passed out on the floor while Dahyun was trying to resuscitate her.

Sana was roaming around and giving unlimited hugs and kisses to everyone. While Nayeon, Jeongyeon and Jihyo were settled on the table. 

“Hi. You look totally my type. Wanna do tequila shots on me?” Nayeon asked Jeongyeon after taking her tequila shot.

“I think you had enough drinks for tonight, Nayeon.” 

“Oh my god! How did you know my name? Jihyo, she knows my name!”

“Try asking her out, unnie.” Jihyo suggested currently on her threshold consciousness.

Nayeon cleared her throat. “Do you have a girlfriend, hot stuff? Coz you know, I can apply. But… there’s a catch.”

“What’s the catch?” Jeongyeon asked.

“I need to be fully compensated, if you know what I mean.” Nayeon winked.

Jeongyeon chuckled. “I’m sorry. I do have a girlfriend.”

“What?! Nooooo! Jihyo, she’s committed! Fuck that lucky bitch!” Nayeon banged her fist on the table.

“Jihyoooo, saranghae! I love you so much! You’re the best leader!” Sana came out of nowhere and kissed Jihyo’s cheeks. “Dance with meeee! Ohyo ohyo ohyo!”

After Jihyo, Sana went to Jeongyeon and sat on her lap.

“Jeongyeon, saranghaee. Thank you for always taking care of meee.” Sana said and wrapped her arms to Jeongyeon. “I love you soooo much, Jeongyeon! Let me kiss your lips!” Sana said and aimed for Jeongyeon’s lips.

Jeongyeon almost decapitated her head while trying her best to move away from her cute and sexy friend.

“Is she the lucky bitch?!” Nayeon stood up and aimed her finger gun at Sana.

Jeongyeon, laughing and shaking her head, pulled Nayeon by the hand.

“I’m just lucky, Nayeonunnie! Lucky for having the best unnies in the world! Saranghaeee! You’re the best unnie eveer!” Sana hugged Nayeon. “Let’s jump, Nayeonunnie! Let’s celebrate!”

Nayeon finally recognized Sana and both started jumping in circles.

“Weeeee! This is so much fuuuuun! Our dorm is getting dizzy, Sanayah!” Nayeon shouted.

“Sanayaaah! Piggyback meee!” Jihyo said but Sana and Nayeon were still busy jumping in circles. “Aren’t you going to do it?! I will cry! Sanayah!” Jihyo’s tears started to form on her eyes.

“Don’t cry, Jihyounnieeee. Wait, are you my unnie? Or am I your unnie?” Sana offered her back and Jihyo immediately jumped to it.

“Nayeonunnie!” Jihyo exclaimed and pointed the unconscious Nayeon on the floor. 

Jeongyeon tried to stand Nayeon up but failed. Then Dahyun, unable to revive Momo, suddenly appeared and cuddled with Nayeon on the floor.

“I pray that your soul will be at peace too, Nayeonunnie.” Dahyun murmured. “Momounnie’s last word was jokbal.”

“Tzuyu, can you check on Momo please? Mina and Chaeyoung, can you help me carry Nayeon on my back?” Jeongyeon asked.

“I will carry Nayeonunnie!” Chaeyoung volunteered.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Chaeyoung.” Mina said.

“Why, unnie?!”

“Because you’re too short.” Tzuyu interjected.

Chaeyoung was speechless for a while.

“I’m still older than you!”

“I’m taller than you, Seyoungah.”

“Seyoungah? Who’s Seyoung?!” Chaeyoung laughed. “Call me unnie!”

“I’m a foreigner! And I’m taller than you, unnie!”

“I need at least 2 people who can help me with Nayeon. Mina is one. Who’s more sober between the two of you?” Jeongyeon asked. 

“Yoo!” Chaeyoung pointed to Jeongyeon. 

“Me? What?”

“Yoo Jeongyeonunnie!” Chaeyoung hugged Jeongyeon. “Carry me instead, Jeongyeonunnie! Saranghae, my no jam bro!”

“I need some help over here!” Jeongyeon yelled at Sana and Jihyo who were now busy with the karaoke. “Mina and Tzuyu, please help Nayeon and Dahyun to stand up. Please check on Momo too.”

“Stand up?!” Dahyun said and immediately stood up like she was raised from the dead. “Jihyounnie, show me your bba se! Let’s dance, everyone! Come on! Come on!”

Sana and Jihyo then played Dahyun’s song.

“Bba se huh! Bba se huh!”

“Bba se huh! Bba se huh!”

“Bba se huh! Bba se huh!”

Everyone bopped the eagle dance in the middle of the living room except for Momo and Nayeon, who were still comatose on the floor and except for Jeongyeon and Mina who did not drink at all. 

Jeongyeon looked around and shook her head at the girls. A lopsided smile crept on her face. 

The drinking session was definitely a disaster. But for Jeongyeon, it was the best disaster that took place in their dorm. And she hoped that this kind of disaster would take place again and again in their lives.

Because unlike real life disasters that would cause great damage and loss of life, this one created a close relationship and intense experience among themselves. They felt more alive. 

All was good. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “We are young & wild  
> I want to live life my way, I don’t care  
> Following the path where my legs take me  
> Leave it freely to your body
> 
> We are young & wild  
> Like fire that is hot and bright  
> We are burning up  
> You know it, all of it”  
> -young and wild


	4. good. better. best.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What is this all about, Nayeon?" Jeongyeon asked while Nayeon was dragging her inside the elevator.
> 
> "I just want to give you a birthday dance." Nayeon giggled.
> 
> "What? Paboyah."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> redamancy  
> (n.) the act of loving the one who loves you, a love returned in a full;

Today was November 1, 2015.

When Jeongyeon woke up, she accidentally bumped a box wrapped in a cartoon penguin lying on her bed. _'To Jeongyeonnnie, I love you!'_ was written on the tag.

Jeongyeon carefully opened the box and was very happy to see what’s inside. It was a 4000 piece Lego set of Disney castle and the gift was obviously from Mina.

The members know that Jeongyeon loves to play with Legos. In fact, Jeongyeon has a whole collection of Legos in her and Momo’s room.

Jeongyeon immediately went outside the room to thank Mina and saw all the members busy setting up at the dining area. Jihyo was the first to see Jeongyeon and immediately sang the happy birthday song in which all the members joined while Nayeon got the cake from the table.

_“Saeng il chuk ha ham ni da!"_

"We love you, Yoo Jeongyeonunnie! Now make a wish!"

Jeongyeon was amazed to see the girls like this even though they only had a few hours of sleep last night due to their debut schedule.

Jeongyeon closed her eyes and wished not only for her but for all the members as well. If not asking for too much, she wished that TWICE would be the next Nation’s Girl Group.

“Thank you very much everyone. I’m really flattered to see all your efforts for me. But all of you should be sleeping still. We have a schedule later." Jeongyeon reminded and the girls assured that it was okay to celebrate her day.

"Everyone, how about we give Yoo Jeongyeon her birthday kiss now?" Nayeon suggested while putting the cake back on the table.

Jeongyeon made a disgusted face in front of girls. Not that Jeongyeon didn't want to receive kisses from them especially from her girlfriend, it's just that she didn't want the girls to think she was taking advantage of them. And more so, Jeongyeon didn’t want to make any reasons for Nayeon to get jealous.

Unfortunately, one by one, the girls went near her and Jeongyeon had no choice but to accept their kisses.

"Mina, thank you for the gift. I really loved it. Let's build the castle together, okay?" Jeongyeon suggested when it was Mina's turn to kiss her.

"That would be nice, Jeongyeonnie." Mina said shyly and stuck her tongue out – her mannerism.

"Yoo Jeongyeon." Nayeon suddenly appeared in front of them and wrapped her arms to Jeongyeon.

"I heard you're waiting for my kiss now." Nayeon pouted her lips a few times.

"No, I’m not." Jeongyeon immediately went to the table to eat and get away from Nayeon.

“Ugh! Yoo Jeongyeon!” Nayeon whined, unable to kiss Jeongyeon.

**Today was good.**

This afternoon TWICE went on their schedule and pre-shot their song in Inkigayo.

During the break, Jeongyeon asked Sadness Manager if she could use vlive to thank ONCE for the gifts she received on the way to the studio. The manager agreed subsequently.

"Hi everyone! Thank you so much for giving me food on my birthday." Jeongyeon said while filming herself on the table.

Jeongyeon was having a hard time opening the food containers and setting up her phone since it kept slipping on the table until Nayeon came and took care of her.

"Let me open them for you."

"Welcome, my guest. Thank you for helping me."

"You can have it now. Enjoy your meal." Nayeon said and set the food in front of Jeongyeon. "Can I have some tteobokki?"

"I had it before coming here and it was really good." Jeongyeon said and both enjoyed the meal while reading comments their fans sent on vlive.

“Nayeonunnie, someone ask if you have any plans in the future.”

“I have a goal for 2018.”

“That’s three years from now and so specific.” Jeongyeon chuckled. “What is it?”

“I want to ride the Harry Potter attraction.”

“Really? Which Universal Studios? Universal Studios Japan?”

“London. I can go to London.” Nayeon said firmly.

“You can? What a big dream.” Jeongyeon snorted. “You are going so far. You should go there and just go on Harry Potter attraction and come back.”

“No, you will come with me.”

“Sorry?”

“My goal includes you.” Nayeon said with her sweetest smile while pointing at the birthday girl.

Jeongyeon smiled, feeling her heart flutter.

“I’ve put down my chopstick.” Jeongyeon announced after devouring a chunk of meat, stuffing the last piece into her mouth.

“Why? Lift it up.” Nayeon commanded.

Jeongyeon shook her head, “There’s no meat anymore.”

“Lift it up. There’s meat.” Nayeon said and pointed herself. “I’m here.” 

Jeongyeon was taken aback and did not know what to say so she unconsciously poked her finger inside Nayeon’s clothes. Nayeon was shocked by Jeongyeon’s behavior in front of the vlive.

“What are you doing?” Nayeon peaked inside her clothes. Apparently, she was wearing a thin lace bra.

“What?” Jeongyeon asked like what she did was a normal thing to do.

Nayeon went closer to Jeongyeon and whispered, “I’m wearing a thin lace bra.”

Both of them laughed.

“You can have me tonight.” Nayeon whispered again and laughed some more.

Jeongyeon became noticeably conscious of the girl seated next to her. Jeongyeon grimaced and tried to suppress what Nayeon tried to instill in her mind, but a small playful smile crept upon her face.

Yes, Jeongyeon was still hungry - but not for food.

**Today was better.**

It was almost midnight when TWICE finished their schedule for the day.

Jeongyeon planned to end her birthday with the girls but Nayeon had another thing in mind.

With the permission from their managers and the girls, Nayeon asked Sadness Manager to drop her and Jeongyeon at Aloft Seoul Gangnam which was just a few blocks away from their dorm.

Sadness Manager handed over what seemed to be a key card to Nayeon while the two were busy covering their appearance with hoodies and caps.

"Use the back elevator located at the right side of the building and go directly to room 0311. I will fetch you two up early in the morning. Call me in case of any emergencies. Update me when you get inside the room. And as much as possible, always look down and don’t talk to anyone on the way."

After getting the assurance from the two, Sadness Manager left.

"What is this all about, Nayeon?" Jeongyeon asked while Nayeon was dragging her inside the elevator.

"I just want to give you a birthday dance." Nayeon giggled.

"What? Paboyah."

Nayeon and Jeongyeon arrived in front of room 0311. Nayeon handed Jeongyeon the key card and let her in first.

The room was filled with metallic black and purple balloons on the floor and above the ceiling. Those balloons above the ceiling had attached pictures of the two at the end of each string. There were also petals of roses and lighted candles scattered all over the place.

And what caught Jeongyeon’s attention was the single rose and letter envelope placed on top of the king-sized bed.

Jeongyeon turned towards Nayeon, obviously tongue tied. No words could escape from her mouth.

"Happy birthday, baby." Nayeon uttered with her ethereal beauty.

Nayeon wrapped her arms to the birthday girl while scanning the area, "I hope you like what you see, Yoo Jeongyeon. I tried my best to prepare all of these despite our busy schedule because I want you to feel how important you are to me. And because I'm always thankful to have you." Nayeon confessed.

Jeongyeon was silent. How could Nayeon repeatedly say those words when for her it was the other way around? For five years they’d been together, Jeongyeon always thought that she was the lucky one.

Nayeon gestured Jeongyeon to open the letter envelope resting on the bed but when Jeongyeon was about to read it, Nayeon immediately grabbed the paper away.

Nayeon cleared her throat and started reading, "To Yoo Jeongyeon who takes me home safely always. My bodyguard, Jeongyeon. I know that you pretended you hate my aegyo the first time we met. Please, don't deny it." Nayeon laughed and continued.

"Ever since the day we met in the practice room, I have fallen in love with you, Yoo Jeongyeon. And I want you to know since that day, I have experienced true happiness with you.”

Nayeon checked on Jeongyeon’s reaction who’s still speechless, “I thought, I was living a life that was already filled with joy but when you became a part of my life I understood what true happiness was, Jeongyeon. You are my source of happiness and I feel blessed that you are the one whom I can share the most loving and most bitter experiences of my life. You were there when I was on the pits of the ground, you were there to cheer for me, and you always made sure to offer your shoulders whenever I need them. I want you to know that I feel the luckiest to be your girlfriend and I feel proud loving someone like you, Yoo Jeongyeon. You are my best friend and my one and only. Saranghaeyo, Yoo Jeongyeon.” Nayeon finished.

A single drop of tear fell from Nayeon’s right eye.

Lost for words, Jeongyeon took a few steps towards Nayeon and kissed her warm lips. Jeongyeon’s hands were on Nayeon’s neck and her thumb caressed the remnants of Nayeon’s tear.

Nayeon’s hands drifted to Jeongyeon’s back and pulled her closer until there was no space left between them. Their lips fitted perfectly as if they were meant for each other. Their shared kisses were slow and soft and filled with so much love that words would never be enough to express.

A few moments later, both pulled apart and regained their breaths.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon looked deep into each other’s eyes the longest. Both of their eyes were filled with so much love and passion.

No words were spoken between the two but a story worthy of them was communicated – both of them understood.

Jeongyeon slowly leaned down and kissed the tender area at the base of Nayeon’s neck. A soft moan escaped from Nayeon’s mouth from Jeongyeon’s attack. Nayeon then held Jeongyeon’s head and slightly pulled her hair until they engaged into a passionate kiss.

Unable to contain herself anymore, Jeongyeon’s hands worked their way under Nayeon’s hoodie and unclasped her bra. Without breaking the kiss, they slowly move towards the king-sized bed and Jeongyeon carefully laid Nayeon on it.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon locked eyes for just a moment, just enough time for them to feel safe with one another.

“Saranghaeyo, Im Nayeon.”

“Nado Saranghae, Yoo Jeongyeon.”

Jeongyeon pulled Nayeon’s hoodie up and over her head. Nayeon felt the little sparks of goosebumps dancing over her skin when Jeongyeon started pressing her lips against her naked body.

Nayeon tasted like November, like hot chocolate on chilly evenings and crisp autumn air. And just like the leaves during the season, Jeongyeon would always irrevocably fall in love with Nayeon.

Jeongyeon’s hand continued exploring Nayeon’s body and the cool room started to feel warm with every kiss and touch the two shared.

The world paused for Nayeon and Jeongyeon at this very moment. Both felt magical and in complete pleasure and euphoria.

Deepest feelings could never be fully put into words.

**Today was the best.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Just us two  
> Only in your arms  
> I always want my heart to flutter  
> Do you know?
> 
> Melt me, sweeter than ice cream baby  
> With your lips, with your touch  
> I can only see you  
> Close your eyes  
> I’ll tell you I love you”  
> -ice cream
> 
> PS. Please listen to ice cream while reading or imagining Nayeon and Jeongyeon’s love scene like I always do. But you may opt not if you’re uncomfortable about it. Thank you! :D


	5. she could never be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What are you doing?” It was after the Christmas party when Nayeon, just inside the other room, sent a text to Jeongyeon. 
> 
> “Thinking of you.” Jeongyeon replied after Momo accidentally melted the Barbie doll’s hair because she tried to iron it. They laughed out loud rolling on the floor.
> 
> “You made my heart flutter! Hahaha. Yoo Jeongyeon, let’s go to Love Line today. I want to give you something important.” Nayeon texted right back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> magoa  
> (n.) a heart-breaking feeling that leaves long-lasting traces

It’s the day before Christmas.

“Guys, today, this early morning, we are here at the market to buy some food and decorations for the Christmas party.” Jihyo said while filming for their show, TWICE TV2.

“Can I buy anything I need?” Momo asked.

“No, we have a list. It’s a long list so don’t worry, guys. You want some pig’s feet?”

“Yes!”

“Since we have a long list to buy, let’s divide our team. Dahyun and I will buy chicken while Jeongyeon, Sana and Tzuyu will order pizza. And because Nayeon, Momo, Mina and Chaeyoung like cakes, you are one team.” Leader Jihyo said and the girls started to disperse with their team members.

“Let’s go to Mon Boulanger and buy Jeongyeon’s favorite cake.” Nayeon said to which Mina and Chaeyoung agreed.

Meanwhile, Jeongyeon, Sana and Tzuyu were not able to buy pizza since the dough, as per the cashier, had not arrived yet. So, they settled for snacks and drinks instead.

After buying chicken, Jihyo and Dahyun proceeded to buy decorations for their Christmas tree.

“I’m gonna eat more delicious things later at home.” Dahyun said, ignoring the free taste food scattered along the aisles. “If we taste food a lot here, I won’t be able to eat a lot later. So, I should be patient.”

“Yes, to enjoy the Christmas party later.” Jihyo agreed. “It’s our first Christmas together. In fact, this is our first Christmas party together, so we should enjoy it very well.”

“Yay! It really feels like Christmas.”

After the grocery and shopping, the girls went back to their dorm. 

“So, these are what we brought,” Jihyo said, referring to the Christmas decors. “We will decorate the Christmas tree and the wall. We have balloons, so let’s decorate very well. We also have food to prepare. Now, we will again divide our group, one group for the decoration and one for the food. Who wants to cook?”

Nayeon, Momo, Dahyun and Chaeyoung raised their hands simultaneously, as if it was planned already. 

“Let’s start then.” Jihyo said and all the girls exclaimed in excitement.

All the girls did their task very well. They decorated their dining area and made delicious food with the groceries they bought.

The girls continued filming for TWICE TV2 and started their party by blowing Jeongyeon’s favorite cake.

“Merry Christmas, everyone!” All the girls yelled in unison.

“Yehey! Let’s cheers to our first Christmas party together!” Jihyo declared. “One, two, three!”

“TWICE, TWICE, let’s do it well! Merry Christmas!”

“Girls, do you like spending the first Christmas as TWICE?” Jihyo asked while all of them were enjoying the food.

“I like it.” Dahyun said.

“This is the first Christmas since we’ve become TWICE, I hope we spend more Christmases together.” Jeongyeon said while looking at Nayeon. All the members agreed.

“Together with members like this and decorating Christmas tree, cooking for ourselves and eating together, made me happy. More than anything, I really like that we are complete. We were busy preparing for our debut and now we’re here. It surprises me that it’s been over a month since our debut.” Nayeon said.

“You can only have one debut performance, so it was more special.” Chaeyoung said. 

“We also got the Rookie Award.” Jeongyeon said. “You can only receive a Rookie Award just once, and we worked hard and received it. I don’t think I’ll be able to forget it.” Jeongyeon continued, remembering again her grandmother.

“Let’s do well in the future. No matter what happens, let’s trust and rely on one another. TWICE is one when the nine of us are together.” Jihyo uttered. “We have prepared something for ONCE, since it’s our first Christmas with them, too. It’s a very special gift.”

Apparently, TWICE covered the Confession Song by GOT7 and would be released today. All the members had fun shooting the whole music video.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon could not contain their feelings in front of the camera while shooting the music video. There were moments they sang ‘I love you’s’ while hugging and directly looking at each other as if they were inside their own world but the directors just let them be. After all, Christmas in Korea was more of a romantic holiday.

TWICE ended up thanking ONCE for their undying support and promised to do their best in the following years to come. 

*****

_“What are you doing?”_ It was after the Christmas party when Nayeon, just inside the other room, sent a text to Jeongyeon.

Jeongyeon and Momo were busy styling the latter’s barbie doll inside their room. It was a gift she received from Nayeon during their exchange gifts. They wanted to style it into Momo’s LOA hairstyle.

_“Thinking of you.”_ Jeongyeon replied after Momo accidentally melted the Barbie doll’s hair because she tried to iron it. They laughed out loud rolling on the floor.

_“You made my heart flutter! Hahaha. Yoo Jeongyeon, let’s go to Love Line today. I want to give you something important.”_ Nayeon texted right back.

_“Aniya. I’m very busy.”_ Jeongyeon hit send and waited for Nayeon to reply but the latter didn’t.

Jeongyeon thought getting no reply from Nayeon was a good sign since she dedicated herself into cleaning the whole dorm this afternoon after the mess from the Christmas party.

Suddenly, their door opened widely.

“Yah! We will leave in 30mins. Be prepared!” Nayeon shouted and closed the door just like that.

*****

Jeongyeon didn’t know what had gotten into Nayeon’s mind. They could have just stayed in the dorm, but the bunny chose to be out in the cold.

“We are going to die here because of hypothermia.” Jeongyeon said while sipping her hot Caffe Americano.

“Don’t be so ridiculous, Jeongyeon. Am I not that hot for you?” Nayeon asked, full of aegyo.

“Nope.” Jeongyeon said with a straight face.

“Yah. I hate it when you always block me like that.” Nayeon whined and sipped on Jeongyeon’s coffee.

Jeongyeon chuckled, “I hope it’s summer already. I’d like to go to the beach, and you know, just enjoy the sun and the waves.”

“I’d like to do that too. How about you write a summer song in the future?”

“Hmm. I can try.”

“And give me the rap part. People never ask me to rap.”

“That can be arranged. I will write a line and give it to you. I’ll ask Chaeyoung for help too.”

“Yehey! That would be really nice. I’m excited! Did you know? My favorite is you in the summer.” Nayeon uttered and rested her head on Jeongyeon’s shoulder.

“And my favorite is watermelon.”

“Yah! Say I’m your favorite too. Me too! Aish. Really, there’s no sense flirting with you like this. There’s no give and take. I just keep on giving.” Nayeon shook her head and rolled her eyes.

Jeongyeon chuckled. “Why are we here anyway?”

“I told you, I wanted to give you something very important. Here.” Nayeon said and handed a photo card – her photo card.

“Eh? You brought me here just to give me this?” Jeongyeon asked while flipping Nayeon’s photo card.

_‘Jeongyeon, please love me more. Please try to like me a little more even in front of others.’_ was written on the back.

“Why? Don’t you like my picture? Do you wanna die?!” Nayeon snarled. “Put that on your phone case so you’ll always have me around.”

“But my laptop is already full of pictures of you, of us.”

“That’s different! Just put that on your phone case will you, Jeongyeon? Anyway, what I really wanted to give you is… this.” Nayeon flashed what seemed to be tickets. “Will you please watch the Day6 concert with me?” Nayeon was full of aegyo.

Nayeon’s smile and bunny teeth could warm and brighten anyone’s day. Of course, Jeongyeon said yes. Jeongyeon would always say yes with and for Nayeon.

After all, Jeongyeon wanted to spend the Christmas Eve with no one else but her girlfriend.

Even though the weather was cold, Nayeon and Jeongyeon stayed a little more and enjoyed the latter’s Caffe Americano while looking at the beautiful panoramic view of Apgujeong-dong.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon were happy with each other’s presence that even the silence was comfortable.

Both felt warm with each other’s company with a deep sense of serenity.

*****

The music from the concert spun around Nayeon and Jeongyeon.

Jeongyeon watched Nayeon smiling brightly as the latter spun and bounced with each move and beat from the concert. Jeongyeon joined her in dancing and spinning as the concert lights twinkled with every move they made.

Both embraced the music and in turn the music took control of them. Some concert goers recognized them during the concert.

But Jeongyeon remembered what Nayeon wrote on the photocard, _‘Jeongyeon, please love me more. Please try to like me a little more even in front of others.’_.

Thus, for Jeongyeon, the concert goers who recognized them didn’t matter. All that mattered was the person beside her – her perfectly beautiful Nayeon.

*****

The dorm was silent when Jeongyeon woke up today.

Momo's bed was empty and no noise of the girls was coming from the outside. Jeongyeon thought of cleaning the whole dorm this morning since she failed to do so yesterday.

It was the best time to clean since the girls went home to celebrate Christmas with their families. Not that Jeongyeon would be spending Christmas alone. She, Nayeon, Jihyo had celebrated Christmas together in Jihyo's house since 2010.

"Good morning, Jeongyeonnie." Mina said, gracefully making her way to the kitchen.

"What are you doing here, Minari? Aren't you going to spend the holiday with your family?"

"Anniyo, Unnie. I'll be going to our building today to practice for the ISAC." Mina said, subtly worried.

Rhythmic gymnastics was included for the first time in the Idol Star Athletics Championships (ISAC) and Mina, having trained for over a decade and being the black swan of the TWICE, was one of the competitors in the category.

"But my parents will be flying tomorrow to celebrate with me. Originally, their flight’s today, but it got delayed because of the heavy downpour of the weather. Snow’s a bummer but it's okay." Mina explained.

"What time will your practice be over?"

"Around 8PM. Then I'll be back here, unnie."

"Well… good luck then, Minari. I know you'll be doing well. Just take care and don't be too hard on yourself. I'm looking forward to it. Fighting!"

*****

Mina arrived at JYP Entertainment building’s practice room.

Some might think it was lonely to be practicing this time of the year, but for Mina it was the opposite. She was glad to use the whole practice room just by herself. She was eager to rehearse her "swan lake" routine.

Being competitive as her, she didn’t want to commit any mistakes during the competition thus the concentration was very prominent on Mina’s face. She knew all the members would be looking forward to it.

A flashback of Jeongyeon came into her mind when the girl crush said she’d be looking forward to Mina’s performance. It made Mina’s heart flutter.

There was something about Jeongyeon that Mina really liked. She completely understood that the girl crush was happily in a relationship with Nayeon, but still she could not help but have a soft spot for her.

Because from the beginning, Jeongyeon took care of her, especially in dealing with her insecurities. Jeongyeon was the one who welcomed and helped Mina in adjusting in the foreign country. Mina could be an open-book and emotionally vulnerable to Jeongyeon but Jeongyeon would not criticize but consider instead. Jeongyeon knew how to appreciate Mina and was dependable. She was also a trust-worthy person.

For Mina, her life would have been tough without Jeongyeon’s existence. With Jeongyeon, her life was a better and happier place. Mina, being quiet all the time, did not need to talk but Jeongyeon would always understand. They bonded over games and Legos and both loved to cook and baked a lot. Mina loved Jeongyeon’s sense of humor. In fact, they had the same sense of humor. Unlike Nayeon, Mina had more similarities with Jeongyeon like they were soulmates.

*****

Mina was extensively practicing for hours now, all grace and poise with her loop, when suddenly the door opened widely.

"Minari!" Jeongyeon shouted.

"Jeongyeonunnie, what are you doing here? I thought you'd be spending Christmas with Nayeonunnie and Jihyo?" Mina’s heart fluttered by the sudden appearance of one of her inspirations.

"Anniyo." Jeongyeon shook her head, pouting. "We are going to spend Christmas with them". Jeongyeon said and handed watermelon juice and skittles – Mina’s favorites.

"Neh?" Mina looked confused.

"Oh. Aren't you done with your practice? Mianhae. I thought you were since it's 8PM already." Jeongyeon said, checking her watch just to be sure.

"Anniyo. I'm already finished, unnie. I was just surprised to see you here. Will it be okay to spend Christmas with 3MIX?"

"Of course! We are TWICE. Let's get your things ready." Jeongyeon said and helped Mina in packing her things.

*****

Jihyo's house was warm and big.

And Mina was welcomed by Nayeon and Jihyo so lovingly she did not feel out of place at all.

Jeongyeon cooked spicy black bean noodles for them. At first, they really did not want to eat what Jeongyeon prepared, not because of the possible taste, but because Jihyo's parents prepared so much food for them. But in the end, they ate the noodles so well.

"Can you believe it? It’s our first Christmas after making a debut.” Jihyo said. She paused for a bit while reminiscing the past. "Before, I was really sad to see my friends make their debut before me. There were times when I wanted to give up and there were lots of painful moments as well. After 10 years of training, finally I'm here. We are here. I'm so happy right now because our dreams are finally happening."

"We are going to do well. We will make happy memories, smile and laugh together like we always do. This is just the start of our dreams. Remember our promise? No matter what happens, we will think of each other first. We will be there for each other and we will always help each other in achieving our dreams." Jeongyeon uttered.

"Enough of that please! Let’s enjoy the night and celebrate with Minari.” Nayeon said, considering the presence of the penguin. “Let's open our gifts."

Each one of them left the table to get their gifts and gave it out to one other. Mina was shy at this moment since she didn't have anything for the three. After all, they already celebrated their Christmas party yesterday and she didn't know she’d be spending Christmas with them.

"Minari." Jeongyeon said and handed a small gift.

"Neh? Jeongyeonnie, I don't have anything for you." Mina tried returning the gift.

"It's okay, Mina. You did your best practicing today so it’s just appropriate to give you something for all your efforts." Nayeon said and handed a small box. Jihyo also gave a book tied with a golden ribbon.

The girls simultaneously opened their gifts. Nayeon, Jeongyeon and Jihyo received pear-like couple bracelets and rings. And Jeongyeon’s gift for Mina was a phone case with a strap while Nayeon's gift was a pair of earrings.

Mina felt happy with all the gifts she received. She thought she had the best unnies in the world.

"We have the same phone case, Minari." Jeongyeon said while showing hers.

_Couple phone case_ , Mina tried to suppress it from her mind.

"Yoo Jeongyeon, this is so cute! My favorite color!" Nayeon said and hugged Jeongyeon. She was delighted by Jeongyeon’s gift. It was a purple unicorn keychain. "Thank you. I like this very much."

"I'm glad you do. But this is what I really want to give you." Jeongyeon said and handed Nayeon a box covered with a purple wrapper.

Nayeon carefully unwrapped the box with her dear life, "No way! Really?! You really did grant me my wish! Thank you, my Santa-nim!" Nayeon held Jeongyeon's face and pecked her on the lips.

Apparently, Jeongyeon’s gift for her girlfriend was an iPhone – the purple iPhone.

"Anything for you. Of course. But yah, don’t kiss me in front of Minari." Jeongyeon said while wiping her lips, but obviously loving the peck though.

Mina sighed and had to look away from the PDA of the two.

"Yes, that’s right! Stop doing that in front of me and Mina. You two disgust me.” Jihyo said straightforwardly, interrupting the two love birds. “And let's set up already. It's almost time.”

"Set up what?" Mina asked.

"We will be singing again for our ONCE. We thought one gift was not enough for the support that our ONCE’s been giving us, so we asked permission from our managers to do a cover once more. And since you are here, you are going to sing with us." Leader Jihyo said giving Mina no choice but to join them.

They set up in Jihyo’s living room. Red and green round balloons and heart shaped balloons were displayed on their background.

Mina remembered the decors she did back in the dorm. She was tasked in arranging and writing all their names on the balloons. While arranging the balloons, she intentionally put hers and Jeongyeon’s balloon beside each other.

A small decorated Christmas tree was placed nearby Nayeon. She was seated between Mina and Jeongyeon, who was on the keyboards, while Jihyo was standing at Jeongyeon’s other side.

The girls ended up filming just a single take which was a relief for Mina. Because of all the songs they had to cover, why it must be "Be my baby" by Wonder Girls.

_"Please, be my baby. Please, be my baby..."_

_"Make me your lady. Make me your lady..."_

Mina thought of Jeongyeon and looked at the girl crush.

Jeongyeon got the guitar and strummed it with her delicate hands after checking the tone. Its tone was rich and full.

Jihyo immediately recognized the song Jeongyeon was strumming, “Hey! I know that song! Remember when Mr. Park wanted to test our song writing skills back then? God. I was scared that time.” Jihyo reminisced.

“I know right!” Nayeon pulled Jeongyeon to her side. “Thanks to you and to this hero, I was able to finish my song.”

Jeongyeon stopped playing the guitar. “Yes, I remember. At first, you worked on the lyrics by yourself. And you had only one day left to go until the deadline. Jihyo and I were there to help you.”

“True! I had to record the guided version, while you two fiddled with the computer.” Nayeon said while typing her hands in the air.

“I’ve never done something like that before.” Jihyo confessed. “Something was deleted out of the blue and we were stuck for two hours! But it was a great experience.”

“Yes. We had so much fun. But really we were able to finish the song because of me.” Jeongyeon said, full of herself.

“Nope! I was the one who wrote the song, so it was because of me.” Nayeon avenged.

“Nope. You wouldn’t be able to finish the song if it wasn't for me. I helped you, remember?”

“Just be honest, Yoo Jeongyeon. I thought you didn’t like me back then, but you love me. Right?” Nayeon, too, was full of herself.

“This is the kind of all of a sudden behaviour.” Jihyo chuckled. “Sorry, Minari.”

“She helped me around because she liked me. She’s in denial back then. She would always tell me how cute I was while doing the song.” Nayeon stated the fact to Mina and Jihyo.

“No. Saying ‘that’s cute’, was my habit.” Jeongyeon denied. “Wasn’t it, Jihyo?”

“Yes. That’s true.” Jihyo agreed.

“You’re just playing hard to get back then because look what we’ve become now. Come here, Jeongyeon.” Nayeon said and pouted her lips to Jeongyeon.

“Stop doing that.” Jeongyeon said and pulled away from the kiss.

“Ha. Am I annoying?” Nayeon asked. “I hate you too.”

“Nayeonunnie, go simply like trying the smart move arms.” Jihyo suggested.

“Ahh.” Nayeon agreed and wrapped her arms around Jeongyeon’s arm and rested her head on the latter’s shoulder. Jeongyeon ended up smiling.

“There! How to deal with Yoo Jeongyeon.” Jihyo said. “But! Stop that already please. How about we play the song for Mina?” Jihyo suggested.

“Yes, please. It would be my pleasure to hear the composition.” Mina said, smiling.

The girls started arranging themselves. The sound from the guitar filled the air without effort. The strumming sound had a hypnotic soothing quality that made them lost to the melody of the guitar.

Jeongyeon twisted her fingers in all sorts of shapes to form the chords around the maple wood fretboard. Once or twice, she would slide her hands up across the higher frets. Eventually, all of them lost all sense of everything except for the music.

At first, I didn’t feel anything  
Every day, we argued  
But I guess we didn’t hate each other  
Sometimes, when you stare at me  
I’m afraid things will get awkward  
So I just stare at the floor  
  
I know you like me  
But did you know?  
I think I like you a little more  
I mean it, my heart goes faster than you  
Oh no Oh no Oh no, always

Always by my side

Will you stay?  
Who cares if you’re slow?

I’ll wait for you  
  
My heart grows like a balloon  
I’m afraid it’ll burst  
My heart keeps doing that  
Whenever I see you  
  
Like the hare and tortoise  
  
You look even more handsome these days  
Whenever you don’t call me  
I get upset for no reason  
Am I being too forward?  
Whenever I feel impatient  
I keep whining for no reason  
  
I know you like me  
But did you know?  
I think I like you a little more  
I mean it, my heart goes faster than you  
Oh no Oh no Oh no, always  
  
Always by my side  
Will you stay?  
Who cares if you’re slow?  
I’ll wait for you  
  
My heart grows like a balloon  
I’m afraid it’ll burst  
My heart keeps doing that  
Whenever I see you  
  
I’m in love with you  
Please hurry  
There’s so much we have to do  
  
Always by my side  
Will you stay?  
Who cares if you’re slow?  
I’ll wait for you  
  
My heart grows like a balloon  
I’m afraid it’ll burst  
My heart keeps doing that  
Whenever I see you  
  
My heart always goes ahead  
Like the hare and tortoise

“So, what do you think, Minari?” Jihyo asked.

“It’s beautiful, Jihyo.” Mina was clapping her hands. “Your voice was smooth and clear yet powerful, Nayeonunnie’s too. And the lyrics were cute and very catchy. The song was telling a story. You wrote the lyrics very well, Nayeonunnie.” Mina gave her honest opinion.

“Aww. Thank you, Minari.” Nayeon was flattered.

“The melody was beautiful. I wished Jeongyeonunnie never stop playing the guitar. It was soothing, in every way.” Mina continued.

“Thank you, Minari. Actually, that song was called ‘turtle’ and Nayeon wrote it for me.” Jeongyeon said and Nayeon’s held her hands.

The song repeated through Mina’s head like a wakeful dream. The sweet lyrics of the acoustic guitar spoke a musical language that Nayeon and Jeongyeon understood.

Mina looked at the two, still hand in hand. She felt disappointed seeing the two, looking lovingly with their smile for each other.

Nayeon’s lyrics for Jeongyeon were like a sweet melody of two love birds, one hundred percent faithful to her mate. But now that Mina understood the story behind the lyrics, it sat like a cold cup of bitter coffee waiting to be drained away.

Mina knew she could never be Nayeon. And Nayeon had everything in her hands – Yoo Jeongyeon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “It’s painful as I thought  
> This feeling of being distant  
> To be natural, I wish I could  
> But no, I’m so conscious of it
> 
> Words I want to say to you piles up  
> My thoughts as many as the number of stars  
> If I hold your hand  
> I wonder if this distance can be reduced  
> Will I be able to reach? Is it enough?  
> I like you, I like you, even though it’s unbearable  
> The trace of your smile, for it to not disappear  
> Being beside you, wishing on your love”  
> -wishing


	6. this is for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Let me take a picture of you, Minari." Jeongyeon suggested and Mina positioned herself looking outside the cafe while holding her chocolate drink.   
> "You have a really pretty side profile, Mina." Jeongyeon confessed.  
> "Thank you. Maybe I'll only face sideways from now on." Mina said jokingly.  
> "Your mole is really pretty too."  
> "No taking pictures from the front please." Mina laughed which made Jeongyeon too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eccedentesiast  
> (n.) someone who hides pain behind a smile;

Today was ISAC 2016.

All the TWICE members practiced rigidly for the competition, especially Mina. It was her turn now in rhythmic gymnastics and all the girls seated in the audience to support their black swan. Jeongyeon was holding a fan picture of Mina, obviously rooting for the elegant contestant.

As a professional gymnast, Mina started the routine smoothly and flawlessly. She also danced gracefully until suddenly she miscalculated the routine and dropped her hoop.

The girls could sense Mina was worried from her miscalculations. She dropped her loop several times which meant she would be penalized for her final score.

After her routine was finished, Mina shed tears and went at the backstage. All the members knew how rigid Mina practiced for this event, so they cried with her.

Mina was regretting the mistakes she made during the routine since she hadn't made any during her practice, especially when Jeongyeon was there to watch her.

Jeongyeon stood up and rushed to the backstage to check on Mina. She saw Mina, head bent down on the table, bursting into tears.

"Minari."

"I’m… a… failure, Jeongyeonunnie." Mina was sobbing hard and her body was shaking.

Jeongyeon went near and patted her head, "No, Mina. I know how hard you practiced for this event. I was there. I saw how dedicated you were in doing this. Sometimes, things don't go the way we want it to be. But it didn’t mean you weren't amazing back there, Mina. To be honest, you were the most beautiful performer back there."

Mina felt imperfect but Jeongyeon thought otherwise. How could the latter always say the right words at the right time?

"I'm sorry… to disappoint… you, all of… you." Mina continued to cry but finally raised her head. Her eyes were red and her make-up was smudge.

"Anniyo. We are completely proud of you. You have worked incredibly hard, especially today. You’ve done better than you think you did back there. Nothing can compare to your routine. You were elegant and poise, like a princess.” Jeongyeon said and continued stroking Mina’s hair.

"And remember that no matter what happens, we will always be here for you." Jihyo suddenly cut in. She and the girls were standing near the door which made Mina smile. They all went to Mina and hugged her.

Mina did not receive her medal from the competition, but still she felt like a winner. She realized what mattered most was the eight loving sisters surrounding her.

With a medal or not, TWICE still won after all.

*****

It's been a month since the ISAC 2016. After what happened, Jeongyeon never left Mina's side and took really good care of her.

They bonded a lot in the dorm and finished the Disney Castle Lego Mina gave her the last time. It took them five days to finish the castle and started building a new one, the Stranger Things Lego.

Jeongyeon was relieved to see Mina happy again.

"Good morning, Jeongyeonunnie." Mina said and leaned in front of the table while Jeongyeon was preparing breakfast for the girls.

"Good morning, Minari. Aren’t you going to eat breakfast with us? Where are you going?” Jeongyeon asked since Mina was well presented.

"Anniyo." Mina shook her head. "I’m going to the mall and go shopping. I just want to ask you something before I head out, Unnie."

"Sure. What is it?" Jeongyeon asked without looking. She was very serious decorating Nayeon's plate.

"Will it be okay for you if we meet later this evening? At Eslow Coffee shop?"

"Neh?" Jeongyeon raised her head, all attention to Mina this time. Even though confused, Jeongyeon agreed.

Nayeon suddenly appeared and back hugged Jeongyeon. "Good morning, baby."

"Good morning, you. Are you hungry? I'm almost done preparing the food." Jeongyeon patted the bunny’s head.

"Yes. Very hungry." Nayeon pouted.

“Your breath stinks.” Jeongyeon covered her nose and made Nayeon whine.

"Good morning, Nayeonunnie." Mina greeted her.

"Good morning. Where are you going, Minari?" Nayeon asked.

"I’ll be spending the day outside shopping, unnie. I’ll be going now. Goodbye, unnies. Have a nice day ahead." Mina said and left.

TWICE spent the whole morning bonding with each other, playing their favorite game of Mafia.

*****

Later that evening, Jeongyeon went inside NaSaJiMi's room to tell Nayeon that she'd be going out to meet with Mina, but the girlfriend was in deep sleep.

Apparently, Nayeon got exhausted from helping Jeongyeon from cleaning the whole dormitory today. So, Jeongyeon decided to send a message instead.

_"Baby, I went inside your room to tell you that I was going to Eslow to meet with Minari. But you were sleeping and obviously dreaming about me, so I didn’t wake you up. Kekekeke. If you read this later, make your way to the shop. I want to treat you dinner for helping me today. PS. You drool when you sleep, and it really does stink!"_

Jeongyeon wore a black hoodie and black denim trouser matched with her favorite Adidas and went out.

Eslow Coffee Shop hadn’t changed its appearance since the first time Jeongyeon discovered the place. The shop was small, and the appearance was bright with all the hanging lights outside and inside the shop.

The aroma of filtered coffee, various cakes and pastries captured Jeongyeon when she entered the shop. The air inside the shop was thick with scents of many coffee flavors.

What Jeongyeon loved about Eslow Coffee Shop was the glass walls. For her, the shop was like an open book. Mrs. Kim, the store owner, once told that she purposely made the store transparent, almost glass-like, for customers and passers-by to feel that the shop was like a person who you could easily know and understand and like a friend who’s completely free from mystery or concealment. Not to mention, it was easier for them to display their freshly baked cookies and breads from the inside.

It's the kind of place where she and Nayeon could sit in for hours and never get bored. Nayeon considered Eslow Coffee Shop as their second “spot”.

"Minari!" Jeongyeon waved to Mina who’s seated near the glass wall. Jeongyeon settled in front of her. “Didn’t you order yet? What do you want, Minari? My treat.”

Initially, Mina disagreed. She wanted to treat Jeongyeon because she was the one who asked the girl crush out. But Jeongyeon, being a gentlewoman as always, succeeded.

For Mina, she always found something beautiful in the dark brown sweet drink sitting prettily in front of her in a bluish porcelain cup. She loved the way her drink was made from afar grown cocoa bean before it was served.

Mina wrapped her gentle hands around her drink, enjoying the heat that spread through her hands. She took a sip and tasted the perfect mixture of bitter and sweet with pure luxury. Partnered with her favorite Devil’s Food Cake, it added an extra slice of heaven to every bite. Mina was in love with this chocolate drink more than she had ever been before. Most likely because she shared the moment with the person in front of her.

Jeongyeon took a sip of her caffe americano. Her face was relaxed, savoring both the drink and the moment with Mina.

"Let me take a picture of you, Minari." Jeongyeon suggested and Mina positioned herself looking outside the cafe while holding her chocolate drink.

"You have a really pretty side profile, Mina." Jeongyeon confessed.

"Thank you. Maybe I'll only face sideways from now on." Mina said jokingly.

"Your mole is really pretty too."

"No taking pictures from the front please." Mina laughed which made Jeongyeon too.

"Anyway, why did you ask me out here, Minari?" Jeongyeon asked and sipped her latte americano once more.

Mina wasn’t able to talk for a while, "I want to give you something, unnie."

Jeongyeon sensed Mina’s nervousness. She looked at Mina’s hands subtly shaking though gently wrapped around her cup.

"Is there a problem, Minari?” Jeongyeon said and held Mina’s hand.

Jeongyeon gazed, just inches away from Mina’s face. This moment was what Mina dreamt of, a moment just the two of them – finally alone.

After a while, Mina carefully removed her hand from Jeongyeon and revealed a folded paper from her bag.

"Here, Jeongyeonunnie." Mina handed the paper to Jeongyeon and the latter started reading.

21:29

This is for you  
This is for you, for you  
You’re my dream  
  
How can I express my overflowing heart  
Maybe I’m a little clumsy  
Now, I want you to listen to me  
  
Everything you’ve done for me  
I remember it all  
You saying thank you to me  
It keeps me warm  
  
Even if it’s a dream, I like it  
Tomorrow, I’ll be there  
Even if you’re not  
That’s okay, I’ll remember you  
Little by little  
Our memories piled up  
I will always keep them  
As they were  
  
With my eyes only  
I know it won’t pass onto you  
So I’ll give back your heart  
One by one  
  
It’s only a small gift  
Can you accept me like that?  
A small word I had in my mind  
It’s me, but  
  
Even if it’s a dream, I like it  
Tomorrow, I’ll be there  
Even if you’re not  
That’s okay, I’ll remember you  
Little by little  
Our memories piled up  
I will always keep them  
As they were  
  
You said it’s thanks to me  
You said I was everything  
The words that hugged me again  
For you  
  
This is for you, you  
This is for you  
You’re my dream  
You’re my dream  
  
Even if it’s a  
Faded memory for us  
You can always take me away  
With a good memory  
Even if our time  
Is running out  
I promise, I’ll keep it  
So we won’t disappear  
  
This is for you

"What is this all about, Minari?" Jeongyeon asked, obviously confused.

"I like you, Jeongyeonunnie. I like you more than a friend." Mina confessed like there was no caution in her bravery. "All the words written there are for you. 21:29 because it's the time when I first met you."

If Mina could rehearse this conversation once, she’d rehearse it a thousand times. She ought to say it, her confession to Jeongyeon. But now after saying her words out loud, her mouth had gone dry and her heart was beating more forcefully than it usually did in front of Jeongyeon.

However, Jeongyeon found it hard to believe. Mina’s honest eyes bored into Jeongyeon’s as if trying to convince the latter she’s not lying nor joking. Mina’s always been so honest all the time, so why wouldn’t Jeongyeon believe her now?

"But... you know my heart, right?" Jeongyeon supposed.

"Yes. And it's okay with me, Jeongyeonnie." Mina said but the words didn't match her face.

"I know the love between you and Nayeon will never be enough compared with what I feel for you." Mina continued. Her eyes started to glisten. "I just want you to know coz it's been consuming me since the day I met you.”

"I didn’t know you felt that way. Sorry, Mina." Jeongyeon wished her words conveyed her sincere apology. “I’m really sor…”

"Please don't say that, Jeongyeonnie.” Mina interrupted. “I really do understand. I’m not expecting you to like me too after what I’ve just said. I just need to say those words coz my heart will burst anytime soon if I still try to hide my feelings for you."

After the confession, Jeongyeon wanted to hug Mina. So, she did.

"Thank you, Mina. Thank you for liking someone like me but… you deserve to be someone’s everything. And I will always be your friend that you deserve, able to give you love freely and completely.” Jeongyeon said and kissed Mina’s forehead, comforting her.

At their table sat their forgotten coffee cups, long since wanting warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I want to tell you, without sounding awkward  
> But it won’t turn out well, I’ll look back and regret it  
> Like a fool  
> You’re always in my heart  
> But I’m just impatiently waiting, yeah  
> I’m like a fool
> 
> My feelings are becoming clearer  
> Gently getting closer, closer, closer to you, yeah  
> I want to come close and tell you  
> I’m in love with you  
> Tell me you too”  
> -like a fool


	7. knight in shining armor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Nayeon’s thoughts stopped as if Jeongyeon’s beating heart took over her mind. 
> 
> The world around Nayeon melted away as her Knight in shining armor squeezed her back. 
> 
> She finally felt safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cwtch  
> (n.) more than a cuddle or a hug; giving someone a ‘safe place’;

Nayeon saw everything.

She saw how tight Jeongyeon hugged Mina and the way Jeongyeon kissed Mina’s forehead. Nayeon was processing the scene, but her mind was jumbling. She was confused and hurt. And mostly, she felt betrayed.

How did her girlfriend and one of her closest friends and group member end up here? Jeongyeon would never kiss Nayeon in public. Not even hold her hand. But for Mina, it was easy for Jeongyeon. It was free flowing and looked natural for Jeongyeon to do so.

Nayeon wanted to confront the two. Her heart was hurting and bursting with so much jealousy.

Nayeon took a few steps towards the shop, then suddenly all Jeongyeon and Mina’s moments came back to her mind. When Jeongyeon insisted on having Mina in the Christmas celebration. When Jeongyeon went to Mina's practice every time. The way Jeongyeon supported and rushed to Mina after the performance during ISAC. The way Jeongyeon comforted and took good care of Mina. And when Jeongyeon chose to spend time with Mina playing Legos and video games instead with her.

Nayeon understood now.

Nayeon wanted to slap Jeongyeon’s face. Nayeon’s jealousy built up and she thought she was going to explode. She wanted to vent it all out to Jeongyeon, but she didn’t want to cause a commotion in public and say hurtful words. It would cause so much scandal involving the three of them. So, instead of continuing her steps, Nayeon took a deep breath, closed her eyes, turned around and left.

*****

Jeongyeon and Mina arrived in the dorm.

Mina immediately joined the girls bonding in the dining area while Jeongyeon immediately went to Nayeon.

Alone in the room and half covered with her blanket, Nayeon was sitting on her bed when Jeongyeon sat next to her.

"Baby, why didn't you come to the coffee shop? Didn’t you read my message? I waited for you for so long. Here, I brought you something." It was salmon sushi and grape fruitade.

"I'm not hungry." Nayeon said coldly.

"Why? Are you sick? Are you hurt somewhere?" Jeongyeon asked and checked Nayeon’s head.

"Anniyo!" Nayeon shouted and pushed away Jeongyeon’s hands. The salmon sushi and grape fruitade flew to the floor. "Dammit!"

"What’s wrong with you, Nayeon?" Jeongyeon asked and tried to clean the mess on the floor.

"Leave me alone, Jeongyeon! I don't want to see you!" Nayeon snapped, feeling all her jealousy.

Nayeon’s shout came right through the walls and the girls evidently heard it because they paused whatever they were doing outside. She hardly ever showed her emotions to the girls but today was different.

"Please, Jeongyeon. Just go." Nayeon pleaded and covered her face with both hands.

Jeongyeon walked towards the door. But instead of leaving, she locked the door.

"You saw it, right? You went there, didn’t you?" Jeongyeon asked but Nayeon did not answer. “It's not what you think, Nayeon."

"Then what, Jeongyeon?! How could you possibly explain to me what I saw earlier? Huh?!"

"It was just a misunderstanding."

"Really, Jeongyeon?! A misunderstanding?! Hugging and kissing Mina in public was just a misunderstanding?! Stop that bullshit, Jeongyeon!" Nayeon glared at Jeongyeon with so much hatred in her eyes.

Jeongyeon did not respond.

"Why? Did you fall in love with Mina? Did you fall in love with her so hard that you're very much willing to make yourselves known to the public?! Well, congratulations!"

Nayeon knew from the start that they needed to hide their relationship from the eyes of the public. But it hurt her so much to see with her very own eyes that Jeongyeon could do the opposite with Mina. 

Jeongyeon scoffed, only adding fuel to Nayeon’s rage. Because for Jeongyeon, there was no logic to the argument Nayeon was trying to give.

“HOW DARE YOU LAUGH?! Do you think this is funny, Jeongyeon?!”

"Of course not! Can you just let me explain first?"

"Fuck you, Jeongyeon! I know what I saw!” Nayeon shouted.

Those first two words sliced deep to Jeongyeon’s heart. Nayeon was shocked for she did not mean to say those words. "...Go out, Jeongyeon. Please… I can't do this now."

Jeongyeon sighed heavily, trying to calm herself.

“Baby, Mina and I… there’s nothing between us. Yes, she… confessed to me but I told her I could be nothing more but a good friend.” Jeongyeon admitted.

Nayeon was very frustrated right now after hearing the confession. She wanted to slap Jeongyeon as jealousy filled her system. She felt her ears getting hot.

“Do you think I’d believe that, Yoo Jeongyeon? I know there’s something going on between you and Mina. You’re a horrible person!”

The shouting and their heated quarrel continued.

“Did I ever lie to you, Nayeon? Did I ever cheat on you? Why is it easy for you to accuse me?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. Maybe, yes!” Nayeon blurted out.

“I never did!” Jeongyeon shouted. She’s getting frustrated by Nayeon’s accusations.

“Really, Jeongyeon? What a terrible liar! You could’ve just ended what’s between us! If you’re not happy with me and you find Mina better, then go! I will not stop you from breaking up with me! And congratulations to the both of you!”

Every mean thing Nayeon had thought of Jeongyeon came flooding out. Their argument grew from nowhere into a tornado. And Nayeon saw hurt in Jeongyeon’s eyes. She knew, the damage had been done.

“How many times do I have to tell you to never use those words whenever we argue?” Jeongyeon asked, referring to the breakup. “Why is it so easy for you to say those words even if you don’t mean them?”

“You think I don’t mean them right this time?” Nayeon asked, provoking Jeongyeon.

Jeongyeon looked defeated, her armors down. She knew right, no matter what she says would only push Nayeon through her limits. So, Jeongyeon ambled her way to the door and grabbed onto the handle.

“Instead of arguing and regretting the things we don’t mean to say, I will say I love you and I respect you, Nayeon. Let’s talk of this later, when we are both feeling better, maybe in that we can find a way to fix this.” Jeongyeon said and left.

Nayeon had always been so self-conscious when she cried but now, she just gave way to the enormity of her heartache. She sank to her knees and cried onto her hands. Between her weak breathing, her tears dripped between her fingers, trailing down on the blanket.

For the first time in her life, Nayeon found herself alone.

*****

Nayeon instantly regretted crying hard last night. Her eyes were swollen, her throat was dry. Jeongyeon would probably tell her she looked ugly.

No, Nayeon didn't want to see her, not because she’s mad. It’s because Jeongyeon was right, Nayeon regretted every single word she said towards Jeongyeon last night.

Nayeon slept in DaChaeTzu's room last night because she didn't want to see and talk to Mina. Being the oldest, she needed to think about everything that had happened yesterday. Nayeon couldn’t imagine being betrayed by the ever so poised and elegant black swan.

Since SIXTEEN, they were close, even other people thought of them as twins. They were even labelled as the TWICE’s twins. Nayeon treated Mina as a younger sister and always made it to a point to boost her confidence.

Even with every small detail, Nayeon would always remember her. For God sake, Nayeon appreciated the things Mina did for them. She even posted the beanie and the phone lace Mina crafted for her.

Nayeon even remembered during the ISAC, she, Jeongyeon and Momo were busy preparing for the SSireum but made to a point to visit Pengsoo, Mina’s favorite penguin character. Mina was preoccupied with the routine but Nayeon thought of her. She ended up taking pictures with Pengsoo to show Mina.

And as if fate was playing with her, Nayeon was on the way to get some water when she saw Mina standing near the window looking at the outside view.

“Good morning, Nayeonunnie.” Mina greeted her.

Nayeon did not acknowledge the greeting or the presence of the girl. Instead, she got herself a glass of water.

“What the hell? Why are my specs inside the fridge?” Nayeon murmured.

“I’m sorry about what happened yesterday, Unnie. I wasn’t thinking straight.” Mina uttered.

“Don’t be, Mina.” Nayeon sighed, finally acknowledging Mina’s presence.

“I should’ve not confessed to Jeongyeonnie. I was selfish. I didn’t…”

“Some things are needed to be said out loud or else it will eat you up soon once left unspoken.” Nayeon intercepted. “I understand, Mina. You did nothing wrong.”

“Aren’t you mad at me, Nayeonunnie?”

“I was.” Nayeon admitted. “Liking someone was easy, it’s admitting you like that someone was the hard part. But you did it anyway. You were brave, Mina. Who am I to judge if you feel that way?”

“I’m sorry, Unnie.”

“I know you never planned on liking Jeongyeon, it just happened. What can I do about that freaking girl crush’s charisma? None. I just don’t want things to be awkward between us. After all, we are TWICE’s twin.” Nayeon smiled.

Mina launched to her twin and busted into tears.

“Thank you, unnie. I’m so sorry for hurting you.”

Whatever Nayeon and Mina talked of didn’t matter from the moment they hugged each other.

For Nayeon, the greatest mistake she could ever make would be looking at things through the lens of her own need. To really mature and to be the kind person that she already was, she must see through the lens of others’ needs too.

She loved Mina like a real family. This allowed Nayeon to view the need of Mina and gave her the ability to make better choices – to forgive.

Some might think that forgiveness is a weakness, but it’s not. It takes a very strong person to forgive.

*****

Nayeon ended up going to Love Line. She thought Jeongyeon would be here since she didn’t see her in the dorm. Nayeon was certain to lower her pride and apologize to Jeongyeon after the reconciliation between her and Mina. 

"Where are you, Yoo Jeongyeon?" Nayeon sighed and whispered to herself. 

"Excuse me, Nayeon."

Nayeon jolted. She did not know she had company and she never heard of that slurred voice before.

She looked at the man who’s a few meters away from her, she could tell he’s from a foreign country just by the looks of him. The foreigner’s hair hung messy around his haggard face. He was thin, wearing a black ripped t-shirt and denim jeans, but sinewy muscles on his limbs made him look strong, nonetheless.

His eyes could not look straight to Nayeon. They were drifting around.

"Hi. I'm a fan of yours, Nayeon. I just want to give you this." The man said and stepped a few forward, wanting Nayeon to get the letter from his hand.

He almost stumbled by doing so. His gait was unsteady though following Nayeon with sly calculations.

"How… how did you know… I was here?" Nayeon asked, disregarding the letter from the man.

Her and Jeongyeon’s hiding place had been discovered.

"I followed you, Nayeon. Your bodyguards were busy taking a break back there, so I sneaked in here to talk to you." The man said, his speech was slurred.

“This is a nice place.” The man scanned the area as Nayeon was tongue-tied.

"Look, Nayeon. I really don't have enough time for this. Just get this fucking letter." The man was shocked by his words.

"God. Sorry, Nayeon. I was just... sorry. Ah, fuck this! Just accept this letter, Nayeon. Please!"

The man moved a few steps again towards Nayeon. Then she detected a strong smell coming from him – horrid sour smell. Like a combination of acrid odor of sweat, with a sour tone of alcohol buried in it.

Nayeon could not move. She was scared to even call for her managers and bodyguards.

"Are you stupid?! God, I didn’t know you were stupid. Can't you hear me?! I said get this fucking letter, Nayeon!" The man shouted and shook Nayeon on both arms.

Nayeon tried to get away, but the man was sturdy.

"Please stop. Please I beg you." Nayeon finally found her voice.

The man paused for a while and leered at Nayeon.

“I love you, Nayeon. I really do."

The man moved his head towards Nayeon, aiming for her lips, when suddenly somebody pushed the man away from her.

Nayeon didn’t know who threw the first punch, but Jeongyeon’s fist was slamming into the man’s face while the man sunk into Jeongyeon’s stomach.

The man threw his body weight to Jeongyeon causing both to fall to the ground.

Pain erupted from Jeongyeon from the point of impact.

“Is that all you’ve got?!” The man shouted. He was pinning Jeongyeon on the ground, his both hands on Jeongyeon’s neck. “Fuck you!”

Jeongyeon replied by punching the man’s jaw. Jeongyeon never punched anyone before, so she was staggered at the pain she caused to the man as her fist connected with his jaw.

She continued this battering until the man, too, fell on the ground. His chest heavily rose and sank with every shallow breath he drew in while blood started to pool into his nostrils.

"Fuckimtiredofthisshit." The man tried to stand but he stumbled.

The bodyguards then suddenly appeared and seized the man.

“Let me go! You have no right to interfere! This is a private matter! Fuck you, Yoo Jeongyeon! I said, let me go!” The man tried to break out a few more times before he finally gave up.

"Please, take him away." Jeongyeon commanded and the bodyguards complied.

Immediately thereafter, Jeongyeon rushed towards Nayeon.

“Are you okay, Nayeon? What did he do to you? Are you hurt?"

"Yoo Jeongyeon." Nayeon cried her fears away. Her arms wrapped tightly around Jeongyeon’s body.

Nayeon cried as if no air would ever be enough, as if she was a drowning victim and suddenly brought up from the depths.

"I'm here, baby. I'm sorry. I’m so sorry. You’re safe now, baby." Jeongyeon said reciprocating Nayeon’s hug. “I'm back now, and I will never leave you again. I promise.”

Jeongyeon’s voice, her arms, her whole being comforted Nayeon. Her gentle arms that hugged tightly but still gave Nayeon space to breathe, her strong arms that told Nayeon everything would be okay.

In that moment, Nayeon let her head rest upon Jeongyeon’s chest. Jeongyeon’s heart beating calmly just for Nayeon.

All Nayeon’s thoughts about the man stopped as if Jeongyeon’s beating heart took over her mind.

The world around Nayeon melted away as her Knight in shining armor squeezed her back.

She finally felt safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Look into my eyes  
> I’ll only show you everything  
> The world reflected in my eyes  
> So it can be in your pretty heart forever  
> In the same time  
> Just you and me  
> I’ll embrace you
> 
> Look into my eyes  
> I’ll only show you everything  
> The world reflected in my eyes  
> I won’t ever leave you alone, you know  
> In the same time  
> Just you and me  
> I’ll embrace you  
> You in my heart”  
> -you in my heart


	8. smile on her face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mina was able to sleep well, in fact, she slept better than she had before – still holding Jihyo and Jeongyeon’s hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> zama mina  
> (phr.) my love;

Nayeon and Jeongyeon got back to normal.

Everything went back to normal including the thing with Mina.

Likewise, it's been a while since the incident at the Love Line. The incident led JYP Entertainment to file for a restraining order against the drunkard.

All the members were concerned hearing the incident. But fortunately, they also heard that criminal complaints were also filed against the man and that immigration service also had been directed to contact the police to have the man arrested in case he returned to Korea.

Jeongyeon was at peace. At least that man could never see nor harm Nayeon again.

TWICE successfully held their debut concert in Seoul, the TWICE 1st Tour: Twiceland the Opening. It was also followed by a series of concerts in other countries like Singapore and Bangkok.

They also succeeded in making a debut in Japan and had eight concerts there as well.

Now, TWICE were scheduled to take their second concert in Asia, the TWICE 2nd Tour: TWICELAND Zone 2 – Fantasy Park.

TWICE would be having 3-night concerts in Korea, 4-night in Japan and would be touring the Asian countries including Thailand, Indonesia, Philippines and Singapore.

Currently, TWICE was busy rehearsing for their upcoming tour.

On top of planning to perform the remixes of their hit songs, TWICE also prepared special solo and unit stages with covers of popular songs. They wanted ONCE to see a side of them that were not usually seen during their promotions and other past concerts.

Dahyun planned to perform her fierce charisma with a killer rendition of Rain's "Rainism", Jihyo, Momo and Tzuyu wanted to channel their inner Beyonce for the "End of Time" and Mina, Chaeyoung and Sana wanted to perform the hit single "Oppa" by Wax.

While Nayeon and Jeongyeon were planning to cover Baek Ji Young and Taecyeon's “My Ear Candy”.

It was Nayeon’s choice in which initially Jeongyeon declined. But Nayeon could really be persistent. Persistent in a sense that, even Mr. Park himself, approved of her.

For Nayeon, doing “My Ear Candy” would be a great excuse for them to be transparent in front of ONCE.

During rehearsals, Nayeon would always touch Jeongyeon in seductive ways and kiss her during the ending scene in which the latter would constantly ignore. Why not? Jeongyeon could always take revenge whenever they were alone.

TWICE started the world tour for two consecutive days in KSPO Dome and all went well during the concerts including Japan, Thailand and Indonesia tours.

ONCE loved the performances especially the solo and unit stages.

Before heading to Manila for the continuation of the concert, TWICE went back to Korea to continue their rehearsals as a group and for the special solo and unit stages for a few days. 

TWICE was in the middle of rehearsing "What is Love?" when suddenly Mina shouted in pain and held onto her right knee.

All the members stopped dancing and their managers stood up from their seats.

All of them rushed to Mina, concernedly.

"Mina, are you okay?" Jeongyeon asked.

"It's painful. Ah! I think I twisted my knee, unnie.” Mina whimpered.

Mina was on the floor sideways and holding her knee with both hands.

The pain obviously throbbed from her knee.

“Let me see it, Mina.” Sadness Manager requested. “Mr. Kim, please call the clinic.”

Mr. Kim instantly obeyed.

“Don't touch it. Please. It’s very painful, unnie." Mina pleaded, suffering from the agony.

Mina was wincing as the pain penetrated to her knee without mercy.

Mina tried to hold still and breath, breath slow and deep until suddenly she passed out.

Sadness Manager lost the color from her face from the scene that she saw. It was as if her heart suddenly stopped beating and all the blood had run down into her shoes.

Jihyo took over the situation.

"Mina! Can you hear me?! Mina!” Jihyo shouted while carefully shaking the girl who lost her consciousness. “We can’t wait for the clinic any longer, let's rush her to the hospital.”

Jeongyeon volunteered to carry Mina on her back and Nayeon immediately called the ambulance.

The ambulance came with aggressive speed. The kind of sheer driving audacity that let everyone know the siren was not a polite request to move.

With Jihyo and Sadness Manager, Jeongyeon’s anxiety peaked higher, seeing Mina strapped onto the stretcher – still unconscious.

*****

The doctor had Mina laid in supine and examined the inflamed muscle on her right knee.

Thankfully, Mina regained her consciousness by the time they arrived at the hospital.

When the doctor pressed his fingers on Mina’s knee, the pain exploded from her knee up to her head.

“I’m going to inject lidocaine into your injured knee, Ms. Myoui.” The doctor held his needle.

“It’s a local anesthetic to reduce the pain and swelling on your knees. We need to decrease your discomfort before running a few tests on you.” The doctor explained.

Mina nodded. She’s been silent since they arrived at the hospital. She looked away at the wall, trying to divert her attention from the procedure.

Jeongyeon and Jihyo held Mina’s both hands as the doctor plunged the needle into her sore knee.

The doctor’s action was precise and purposeful. His movements were unhurried, choreographed and deliberate. Thus, Mina did not feel the needle.

“Do you still feel any pain, Ms. Myoui?” The doctor asked after a few minutes.

“No, doctor. Thank you very much.” Mina said with relief.

The doctor then explained the next procedure, including its purpose and listened to the inquiries of Sadness Manager and Jihyo.

“Will she still be able to perform for our upcoming concert?” Sadness Manager asked.

“I’m positive about it, Ms. Kim. Mina was very responsive to the local anesthetic we’ve given so the prognosis is good. But as I have said, we need to run down a few tests and read her lab results to tell the exact diagnosis.” The doctor explained.

That night, Jeongyeon, Jihyo and Sadness Manager stayed with Mina.

Mina was grateful and relieved for having such wonderful friends, manager and attentive doctors and nurses.

The pain in Mina’s knee disappeared and she felt a small smile formed on her face.

She was able to sleep well, in fact, she slept better than she had before – still holding Jihyo and Jeongyeon’s hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “How was your night?  
> Did you have good dreams?  
> You just need to get through  
> Day by day  
> Have strength, think of me
> 
> Baby think about me  
> all night long  
> We are together right now  
> In our dreams, it’s just us two  
> As we make our happy moments”  
> -Jaljayo, good night


	9. if it would have been

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Don’t ever do that again, Mina. Please.” Jeongyeon immediately pulled Mina and hugged her. “I... I love you.”
> 
> “I love you too, Jeongyeon.” Mina reciprocated the hug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> absquatulate  
> (n.) to leave without saying goodbye;

After running a few tests on Mina, it turned out she sustained a knee injury.

"Are you sure you can still perform in the concert?" Jihyo asked.

They were on their way back to the dorm after the treatment.

"Yes, Jihyo. I feel okay and the doctor said so. I just need to rest for a while. And besides, I don't want to disappoint our ONCE." Mina said while adjusting her seat.

Jeongyeon immediately adjusted the seat for her.

"Thank you, Jeongyeonunnie. You're still the sweet person I know.”

“You’re welcome, Mina. Always remember that I’m always here to help and take care of you.”

*****

The Manila concert was truly memorable.

The fans were really energetic and cheering very loudly.

The PH ONCE also loved the solo and unit stages even though some members were having a hard time performing due to their injuries. Mina with her knee injury, Jeongyeon with her stye and Nayeon with her neck pain.

Mina thought of giving up, but she could not. How could she when ONCEs were cheering so loud for her? She did not want to disappoint them.

Mina felt suddenly anxious and insecure for thinking about giving up. She was backstage trying her best to massage her knee when she saw the "My Ear Candy" Performance of Nayeon and Jeongyeon on the back monitor. The PH ONCEs really loved Nayeon and Jeongyeon’s subunit.

A flashback came into Mina’s mind.

_“Thank you, Mina. Thank you for liking someone like me but… you deserve to be someone’s everything.”_

Mina thought she would never be someone like Nayeon. That Jeongyeon would never love someone like her. And that ONCE would never want to stan someone weak.

Suddenly, Mina felt an intense fear. She felt dizzy and could not breathe. Mina felt she would faint due to the suffocating feeling. It felt like her chest was being replaced by a black hole.

Nausea started to creep from Mina’s abdomen up to her head until the world almost went black.

"Minachan!" Sana shouted, distracting Mina from the attack. "It's our turn to the stage. Let's go!"

"Okay." Mina said and stood up. She staggered backward and her mind swirled for a moment until she regained her strength by taking a deep breath.

The show must go on.

*****

The energy, fan chants and singing that PH ONCE gave to TWICE were truly deafening.

Before ending the whole concert, the members spoke one by one to PH ONCE.

"Really, the Manila Concert was the best. In the last years since we made our debut, I saw the best and loudest reactions here. We didn't expect the cheering could be this loud. Thank you very much, Manila!" Chaeyoung shouted and saw a meme banner of herself – the MNET meme.

TWICE were about to sing their final song when the whole arena shouted "Ear Candy!" nonstop. PH ONCE were obviously requesting for Nayeon and Jeongyeon.

The cheer was really loud so Jihyo granted the request of PH ONCE and called Nayeon and Jeongyeon in front to reenact the final part of "My Ear Candy".

Nayeon and Jeongyeon looked happy.

Mina clearly saw how the two loved the moment and how they almost kissed on the lips. She could see it, the depths in both Nayeon and Jeongyeon’s eyes.

When Jeongyeon looked at Nayeon, it was as if every breath was taken from Nayeon’s lungs and floated into the air like midnight fog. It was as if the two were alone and all the people inside the arena had vanished. The way Jeongyeon held Nayeon’s face between her hands like holding her with the promise of eternity.

Looking at them made Mina feel like the world stopped. This was what being in love felt like, a story no one ever wanted to end – except for her.

Mina had longed for Jeongyeon for so long and now she could not bear to lose her. To lose that someone who made her feel so complete and special.

The arena screamed the loudest and Mina thought the moment would be sweetest – if it would have been her.

*****

After the last song, TWICE said their goodbyes and went backstage.

"Minari, why are you crying? Are you okay? Does your knee hurt?" Jihyo was concerned.

“Please... I want to be alone, Jihyo." Mina said and limped to the comfort room.

“Mina...”

“Jihyo, let me check on Mina. Will you call the medic for her?” Jeongyeon interrupted and Jihyo agreed.

Mina was alone in the comfort room, her hands on the counter, her head down and unable to look at herself in the mirror.

"Mina... are you okay?" Jeongyeon went closer to Mina.

Jeongyeon tried to connect with Mina’s eyes but Mina was still looking down.

"Hey, Minari. Look at me. Please. Are you okay?"

It took a while before Mina slowly looked directly into Jeongyeon’s eyes.

And then her lips.

"I love you, Jeongyeonunnie.'' Mina suddenly launched herself and kissed Jeongyeon on the lips.

“Mina!” Jeongyeon held Mina’s arms and pushed her away. “What are you doing?!” Jeongyeon was completely shocked.

“I just had to do that, even for once.”

After a few seconds Mina broke down to tears.

“I thought I was okay. I thought it was okay. But after what I saw earlier, I felt really hurt, Jeongyeonunnie. My heart couldn’t stop from breaking. What should I do?" Mina pounded her chest a few times.

Jeongyeon was speechless.

"Why can't you love someone like me, Jeongyeonunnie? Why?! I love you. I love you so much." Mina wrapped her arms to Jeongyeon very tight.

"Mina...” Jeongyeon hugged her back. “I'm so sorry… I’m sorry if I keep on… hurting you…" Jeongyeon could not choose the right words to say for Mina to feel less pain.

“You are the most amazing woman I have ever met. You deserve someone better. You deserve someone who will love you unconditionally, Mina. And I’m sorry, really deeply sorry because it’s not me.”

After a while, Mina let go of Jeongyeon’s hug.

Mina gazed at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were fixed on her reflection.

To describe Mina’s facial expression would be like describing a blank sheet of paper. There was no anger, no sadness, no joy, no happiness nor anything.

Mina’s face fell into an expression Jeongyeon never associated with her features before.

Suddenly, Mina clenched her fist and swung her arm directly to the mirror. Jeongyeon instantly recognized what was about to happen.

“MINA! NO!”

Mina stopped. Her knuckles just a few inches away from the mirror. There was no impact nor sound of a breaking glass.

In that instant, Mina blinked like she came back to reality. Her lips slightly parted and her eyes were as wide as they could stretch.

“I…”

“Don’t ever do that again, Mina. Please.” Jeongyeon immediately pulled Mina away from the mirror and hugged her. “I... I love you.”

“I love you too, Jeongyeon.” Mina reciprocated the hug.

Suddenly someone grabbed Mina’s arm.

When Mina turned to look, a hand connected to her cheek. The slap was as loud as a clap and it stung Mina’s face. She staggered backwards, clutching her face.

“HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME?!” Nayeon shouted, pointing at Mina.

Jeongyeon immediately grabbed Nayeon by her waist but Nayeon was fast and slapped her too. It was an open-handed smack that left a red swollen mark on Jeongyeon’s face. A small cut appeared where Nayeon’s ring, the Chanel Coco Crush, had caught Jeongyeon’s cheek.

"Minaunnie!" Tzuyu shouted.

Everyone in the room just stood there in silence. Everyone knew they should not show their emotions to the innocent maknae.

"Come, unnie. Let's go out of here. Your medic will attend to you." Tzuyu, probably heard the commotion, assisted Mina and left.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon remained silent.

There was an absolute silence. Not even a sound could hear from the outside of the comfort room. Even their own breaths seemed to die as soon as it left their mouths and instead of being soothed by the silence, Jeongyeon's senses became heightened.

“Let me explain this time, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon pleaded.

“I heard it, Jeongyeon. I saw it with my own two eyes. Tell me, how will I believe you this time?” Nayeon looked at Jeongyeon. A single drop of tear fell from her eye.

“Mina was… she…” Jeongyeon was speechless. “Nayeon, I just had to say those words to Mina coz she almost….”

“Stop fooling me, Jeongyeon! You were in each other’s arms!” Nayeon’s voice echoed to the room.

“You don’t understand, Nayeon. Mina almost…”

“Please stop, Jeongyeon. Just please... just stop hurting me.” Nayeon sobbed and grasped her chest.

Jeongyeon could not say a word. For the first time in her life, she saw Nayeon’s heart breaking because of her.

“I can’t do this anymore. Let’s break up, Jeongyeon. Please.” Nayeon blurted out.

Jeongyeon was taken aback by Nayeon’s words.

“How many times do I have to tell you to never use those words whenever we argue, Nayeon?”

“Do you even know how I feel, Jeongyeon? Do you even consider my feelings? Do you even care about me? I feel so pressured right now, Jeongyeon. Because of the ongoing concert, because of my neck pain, because of what happened between us and Mina and because of… because of the drunkard. There’s a lot of things going on right now, but I can’t feel you with me, Jeongyeon.”

“What do you mean?”

“Can’t you see it? You are always there for Mina.”

“That’s not true, Nayeon.”

“It is, Jeongyeon. That’s why you said those words to Mina. Because you want to be with her.”

“No! Stop saying that, Nayeon. You’re the only one that I love and nobody else.” Jeongyeon assured and hugged Nayeon.

Nayeon stood still.

“I want to believe you, Jeongyeon. Really, I do. But I don’t know how to anymore.”

“No, please. Baby, don’t do this. Please.” Jeongyeon pleaded, her hug getting tighter. “Let’s fix this, okay? We can fix this. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Nayeon was silent. She could not even move her lips to say a word. Her mind was blank, and her eyes were searching for possibilities. Jeongyeon broke the hug and looked into Nayeon’s eyes, desperately searching for answers.

After while Nayeon found her words.

“Let's reveal our relationship to the public. At our next concert in Singapore." Nayeon said. “I would believe you then. If you really love me then it will be easy for you.”

"You know we can't do that, Nayeon." Jeongyeon shook her head.

"Why? Because of Mina?!"

"Yes! And because of Momo, Sana, Jihyo, Dahyun, Tzuyu and Chaeyoung. All of them!" Jeongyeon shouted out of frustration.

"They will understand!" Nayeon shouted back.

"Yes, they will! They already do! But the world will never understand, Nayeon. Coming out to the public will never fix this mess. It will cause Mina and others more harm than good.”

“Why is this all about Mina?!”

“This is not all about her! Don't you remember what Mr. Park said during our debut? Coming out to the public will destroy TWICE, Nayeon. Do you really want that to happen?”

“Then let’s break up. Coming out to the public won’t be your problem anymore. Mina won’t be harmed anymore. You can also go to Mina if you want to. There! I fixed your fucking problems, Yoo Jeongyeon!”

“Don’t be so selfish, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon was very frustrated.

“Selfish?! Really? This wasn’t the first time I caught you with Mina! How dare you say that when I’m the one who always understand?!” Nayeon pushed Jeongyeon. “After all this time, Jeongyeon? You think I’m selfish?”

“Isn't it enough that we love each other? Isn't that enough, Nayeon?" Tears started to fall from Jeongyeon’s eyes.

"If you love me then you will want the public to know! You will do that for me because you are proud of me! Of us!”

“I am proud of us! But I can’t do that, Nayeon. You know that. Please, let’s stop fighting.” Jeongyeon pleaded.

“You choose, Jeongyeon. We will tell everyone about us, or we will break up."

“Please don’t do this, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon pleaded and walked towards the door. “Let’s just go back to the hotel and talk about this later when we feel better.”

“That’s you, Jeongyeon!” Nayeon shouted and Jeongyeon stood still, her back facing Nayeon. “That’s you always running away from our problems! That’s you always turning your back at me! That’s you always trying to escape! If you leave me right now, I swear to God, we are done.” Nayeon risked.

As Nayeon observed Jeongyeon for a reaction, the silence hung in the air like the suspended moment before a falling glass shatters on the ground. She expected for Jeongyeon to turn around, run towards her, embrace her tightly and dissolve in tears, but Jeongyeon did none of those things.

Instead, Jeongyeon walked away without a word.

Nayeon stayed rooted to her spot. There was a part of her that would never believe Jeongyeon would not come back to laugh at her for falling for this elaborate joke.

But her tears fell rapidly from her eyes as she sank to her knees. Her tears were not quiet and controlled, they fell as fast as the rain fell.

Nayeon remembered what Jeongyeon told her during the incident at Love Line.

_“…and I will never leave you again. I promise.”_

A promise that had been broken.

In that instant their relationship shattered into pieces of disarray shards. Nayeon was broken into a thousand more pieces inside. Nayeon knew there was no cure for her broken heart. She was brought down to the lowest part of herself that she could imagine.

The whole world had vanished for her and there was only pain enough to break her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I can’t believe I hurt you  
> I guess I was blind  
> Your eyes only looked at me  
> But I made tears come to those eyes  
> My love I didn’t deserve  
> To have your love  
> I didn’t know  
> Your precious love back then
> 
> After I let you go  
> You don’t know how much I regretted  
> Come back to me, forgive me  
> Because that won’t ever happen again  
> I thought too easily  
> Of your love  
> Come back to me, back into my arms
> 
> After you left, darkness came  
> Then I knew that I need you”  
> -precious love


	10. warmth, love and patience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the Manila Concert, TWICE went to Singapore for the continuation of the tour. Instantaneously, the news broke out regarding Mina.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> raison d'être   
> (n.) the most important reason or purpose of someone’s existence

After the Manila Concert, TWICE went to Singapore for the continuation of the tour. Instantaneously, the news broke out regarding Mina.

JYP Entertainment confirmed that Mina was struggling with sudden extreme anxiety and insecurity towards performing on the stage. And because of this, the company decided to pull out Mina from the tour.

Before the start of the concert, Jihyo gathered all the girls.

“We can do this! Let’s give ONCE the concert that they deserve. Let’s set aside our personal emotions and give ONCE the best that we are.” Jihyo shouted, elevating the morale of the girls. “One, two, three!”

“TWICE, TWICE, let’s do it well!” All the girls shouted in unison.

After the motivation from the best leader, the girls kicked off the stage with their upbeat opening number. The crowd was driven into frenzy upon seeing the eight members and cheered with their powerful fan chants like everything was normal.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon were still avoiding each other. But both were able to deliver a stunning performance of their cover of “My Ear Candy”. Afterall, they were professionals and giving ONCE the best that they could be was their topmost priority.

At the start of the song After Moon, ONCE immediately turned their lights sticks to mint green – Mina’s official color.

Upon seeing it, TWICE couldn’t help but express their sadness for the missing member. The absence of Mina was clearly felt at the Singapore Indoor Stadium and contributed to the share of flowing tears of ONCE and TWICE both on stage and backstage. ONCE tried to boost the emotions of the girls by giving their love and comfort through ear deafening fan chants.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon were crying for the missing member too, but both knew they were crying their hearts out for another reason – their breakup.

*****

Immediately after the Singapore Concert, TWICE went back to Korea. And after getting approval from her managers, Jeongyeon went home to her family.

Their house was welcoming from the entrance gate to the front door. Upon entering, the wide hallway was full of photographs of people who held her heart – including pictures of her with Nayeon.

Jeongyeon walked to the living area and stood there. For Jeongyeon, this house was made of love where she could rest and spent the day with her family without thinking about any problems.

“Appa! Omma! I’m home!” Jeongyeon shouted.

“Jeongyeon?! Is that you?!” Mr. Yoo rushed down from the stairs. “Yah. Why didn’t you inform us that you’d be home? Come here.” Mr. Yoo hugged Jeongyeon lovingly.

“It was a surprise, Appa.” Jeongyeon returned the hug and smiled for the first time after a while.

“If I knew you’d come, I wouldn’t let your mother do the groceries with you sister. Where’s Nayeon? Isn’t she with you?” Mr. Yoo asked.

“It’s okay, Appa. Let them spend time together. And no, Appa. Nayeon is in the dorm. Probably tired from our concert.” Jeongyeon tried her best to smile this time.

“I see. Congratulations on your concert, Jeongyeon. We are so proud of you! Are you hungry? I’ll cook your favorite tteokbokki.” Mr. Yoo suggested, to which Jeongyeon declined.

“Don’t worry about me, Appa. But do you have ingredients for baking? I miss baking.” Jeongyeon asked.

“Yes, we do have ingredients. Aren’t you tired?”

“No, Appa. I’m okay.”

“Okay then. Enjoy baking, Jeongyeon. If you need anything just call me, okay? Welcome home, Jeongyeon.” Mr. Yoo said.

*****

Before the mayhem started, Jeongyeon wore her apron and neatly tied her hair with her favorite yellow scrunchie. She closed her eyes and let the spirit of food fly into her mind.

For Jeongyeon, aside from cleaning, baking was meant to find her peace. In the chaos of creation would come precise measurements and from raw ingredients would come something beautiful.

She opened her eyes and the creation began.

*****

“Jeongyeon, you have a visitor.” Mr. Yoo said, rushing through the door after the doorbell rang.

"Who is it, Appa?" Jeongyeon asked, her eyes feasting on the almost-ready-to-be-eaten chocolate chip cookies inside the oven.

"That smells good, Jeongyeonunnie.” Mina said while standing on the entrance of the kitchen.

“Mina, please come in." Jeongyeon was surprised.

“I’m sorry about my sudden appearance. My flight to Japan is tonight and I just want to talk to you before leaving.” Mina walked towards the kitchen counter.

“Sure. Of course, Mina.”

Mina was contemplating before saying what she wanted to say.

“Sometimes, we find a person we love, who can make us laugh, make us question everything, and change us for the better. Sometimes, that person could be our best friend. And… I found you, Jeongyeonunnie.” Mina paused.

“I don’t want to lose a best friend like you, Jeongyeonunnie. So, I… I just want to apologize for what I did and said back in Manila. I wasn’t thinking clearly back then. …I'm sorry for the troubles I’ve caused you and Nayeonunnie. And I'm sorry if I'm burdensome to TWICE.”

“You are not burdensome, Minari. Your health is more important than anything. And it’s okay, Mina. You don’t have to apologize. I understand.” Jeongyeon said comfortingly. “You… weren’t yourself back there. You were struggling with so much pressure. I completely understand what happened back in Manila.”

“Thank you, Unnie.” Mina said, obviously relieved.

“But do you really need to leave?” Jeongyeon asked.

"Yes, Unnie. It was my choice and the doctor’s recommendation. Aside from forgetting what happened between us, I really need this break to fully recover my knee injury.”

"Will you be okay though?" Jeongyeon asked sincerely.

"Yes, Unnie. Don't worry, I will be back soon. And when I get back, I will be stronger than ever for our group and ONCE. I've realized being in TWICE and having ONCE are more important to me that's why I need to fully heal myself. I want to give the best of me again when I step on the stage and perform." Mina said sincerely and smiled.

“That’s our TWICE’s Black Swan, Minari.” Jeongyoen said proudly.

The oven rang as if it was a sign that their conversation was concluded.

“Do you want to eat chocolate chip cookies before heading back to Japan?” Jeongyeon asked with her lopsided grin.

“I would love too, Unnie.” Mina agreed.

There was kindness in Jeongyeon's smile, a gentleness. She was the kind of person who lived as if she was a sunshine that only radiated from the best aspects of those she met, their flaws entirely invisible to her gaze. She was always giving warmth, consistent love and patience.

And most importantly, she was Mina’s best friend. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Even if night and day passes, even if time passes  
> Remember that I will always be by your side  
> I eagerly waited for it  
> We will meet someday  
> You and I you and I you and I  
> Like a dream I don’t want to wake from  
> After dark  
> If you look at the sky  
> Like that moon in the daytime  
> You and I you and I you and I  
> I will always be by your side  
> I’ll be there”  
> -after moon


	11. never on the list

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Of course, I choose Nayeon.” Jeongyeon responded, definitely. 
> 
> Jeongyeon took her car key and left without further saying a word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> qalbi maksur  
> (n.) my heart is broken

It's been three months since Mina went to Japan.

TWICE heard that she was doing fine, and her knee was getting better. JYP Entertainment assured that Mina would be back soon.

Jeongyeon, on the other hand, was still staying with her family. Sure, she would attend their dance practices, photo shoots and other schedules but she would directly go home after those.

Jeongyeon was busy making hanging flower pots when she received a call from Sana.

Apparently, Sana wanted Jeongyeon to go to the dorm because Jihyo planned to get together and they would be video calling Mina to update with her.

“Sorry, Satang. But Seungyeonunnie and I will be visiting the animal shelter today. Next time, I promise.” Jeongyeon declined.

“Hmm. Okay, Jeongyeon. We miss you. Really really miss you.” Sana said, full of aegyo. “Say hi to Seungyeonunnie for me, okay?”

“Sure. Bye.” Jeongyeon said and ended the phone call.

*****

“She’s not coming.” Sana announced to the girls apparently waiting.

“Hmm. I miss Jeongyeon.” Momo said and all the girls agreed except for one.

“You can’t force a person to do what she doesn’t want to do. Anyway, I have to go. See you later for the get together.” Nayeon said and left.

Today, Nayeon had an individual project for a web series. She and Minhyuk of BtoB would be featured in several videos of MBig TV’s web series of comedy skits in which they were tasked to give tips on certain common scenarios of daily life.

*****

Jeongyeon ended the phone call. She was thinking about what Sana said when suddenly a blow struck on her head.

“Ouch! What’s that for?!” Jeongyeon was holding her head out of pain.

“Wow! Your head is really hard! I can’t crack my egg on my head, but it took me one blow on you.” Seungyeon said.

“I can’t believe I have a sister like you.” Jeongyeon said while shaking her head.

“No. It’s the other way around. I can’t believe I have a sister like you. Why are you even here? I mean, thank you for helping me take care of Nanan, Bami and Tan. But are you avoiding the girls? Our visit to the animal shelter is scheduled tomorrow, not today. Why did you lie to my favorite Sana?” Seungyeon asked while eating her hardboiled egg.

“I’m not avoiding them. I really thought that today was our schedule.” Jeongyeon lied.

“Yah! Stop lying, you’re not good at that.” Seungyeon sighed. “You know, Jeongyeon. You can’t run away from your problems forever. In fact, you can’t run away from the girls because in the first place, they are not even part of your problem.”

“Aren’t they? How can you be so sure?” Jeongyeon asked. “I can’t… I don’t know how to face them after what I’ve done to Mina.”

“Jeongyeon, what happened to Mina wasn’t your fault so stop blaming yourself. Mina went here for forgiveness so you should give the same to yourself. Don’t be too hard on yourself, Jeongyeon. Can’t you see it? The girls are looking for you. They miss you for sure. They understand what happened and they don’t blame you for that.”

It took a moment before Jeongyeon was able to answer.

“I… don’t know what to do with Nayeon, Seungyeonunnie.”

“Talk to her! Jeongyeon, I have known Nayeon for so long and I must say she’s the best person for you. Every time I look at you two, I feel your love for each other. Jeongyeon, everyone deserves a second chance and you must understand that during difficult times, you must choose to love.” Seungyeon paused, checking if Jeongyeon was listening to her. And Jeongyeon was.

“There are no perfect lovers, we all flaw, but knowing these flaws and still loving with all our hearts creates a perfect love, Jeongyeon. You know, I want to be your older sister all the time. I want to take care of you all the time. But sometimes, you must do things on your own, Jeongyeon. So, what do you choose?” Seungyeon asked.

“Of course, I choose Nayeon.” Jeongyeon responded, definitely.

Jeongyeon took her car key and left without further saying a word.

*****

Nayeon arrived at JYP Entertainment building with Sadness Manager.

Nayeon was glad she’d be busy doing her web series today. She looked forward to doing the comedy skits hoping to lighten up her mood and forget about the person who was bugging her mind for three months now.

“I have a kissing scene with Minhyuk, Manager Kim?” Nayeon asked. She was preparing in the dressing room while reviewing her script.

“Yes. But we have talked to the directors already. We can make revisions on that scene later.” Sadness Manger assured.

“Okay. That’s a relief.” Nayeon sighed. “It’s not that I don’t want to do the scene. It’s just that…” Nayeon thought of Jeongyeon. “Never mind, Manager Kim. Thank you.”

Nayeon wanted to divert her attention by posting on Instagram. But when she was about to bring her phone out, she was disappointed to know that she left it at the dorm.

“Manager Kim, I left my phone. Can you contact Jihyo for me? I need to talk to her, please. Thank you.”

“Sure.” Sadness Manager said and lent her phone to Nayeon.

“Hello, Jihyo. I’m sorry to bother you. But can you bring my phone here later after your groceries for the get together? I left it on my bed, and I think I’d be doing the shoot for the whole day.”

“No problem, Unnie. We can drop it by before heading to the grocery.” Jihyo assured.

“Thank you, Jihyo. See you later.” Nayeon said and ended the call.

After a while, a tall man with sharp features and well-built entered the dressing room.

The man had a good sense of clothing and attractive personality. He was handsome from the depth of his eyes to the gentle expression of his voice. Nayeon thought his hairstyle and hair color were familiar to her.

"Hello, everyone. Hello, Nayeon." Minhyuk greeted.

"Hello, Oppa." Nayeon replied and bowed her head.

"I just wanted to say hi and let's do our best during the shoot." Minhyuk said and gave energy drinks to everyone.

"Thank you, Oppa." Nayeon said.

*****

Minhyuk and Nayeon were able to shoot the scenes pretty well. 

And to conclude the web series, Minhyuk needed to kiss Nayeon after they finally became comfortable in front of each other after 300 days of dating.

"Okay. Since you two have so much great chemistry on the screen, we will do the kissing scene for real." The director declared.

Nayeon and Minhyuk were shocked but made their reactions subtle.

"Nayeon, please tell me if this situation is awkward to you. We can ask the director to cut the scene right before the kiss." Minhyuk whispered.

"It’s okay, Oppa. Let's do what the director asks of us." Nayeon whispered back, being professional herself. “I don’t want people around us to think we are picky when it comes to acting.”

Nayeon honestly did not want to do the scene, not because Minhyuk wasn’t attractive or anything. In fact, the guy was respectful and considerate himself, but it was because she thought of Jeongyeon.

Jeongyeon who literally appeared at the back set up near the director’s seat as if Nayeon summoned her just by thinking.

Jeongyeon was looking at Nayeon and from the expression of her face, she heard what the director commanded a while ago.

Jeongyeon’s face was in dismay when Nayeon saw her purple iPhone on Jeongyeon’s hand.

"Okay! Both of you, be ready! Let's do the kissing scene in three two one. Action!" The director shouted.

Minhyuk looked directly into Nayeon’s eyes, his face was so close to her that Nayeon could smell the sweet fragrance coming from him. Minhyuk leaned in a little closer until their foreheads almost touched.

Nayeon sat frozen onto her seat and looked at Minhyuk. Her heart was beating faster, not sure if it’s because of Minhyuk or because of Jeongyeon who would witness the kiss.

But Nayeon had to do what the director said, so she closed her eyes in anticipation and waited for Minhyuk to touch his lips with hers.

*****

As soon as Jeongyeon opened the door of their dorm, Sana rushed to give her a welcome squeeze.

"Jeongyeon! I thought you’re going to the animal shelter with Seungyeonunnie? I miss you, Jeongyeon!” Sana wrapped her arms to Jeongyeon tightly.

“Sorry, Satang. I got confused with the schedule. It will be tomorrow.” Jeongyeon reciprocated the hug.

All the girls went to Jeongyeon after Sana’s announcement of her return.

“Jeongyeon! Thank God, you’re still alive!” Jihyo dashed towards Jeongyeon.

“I can’t miss the get together, right?”

“Of course! All of us are expecting you to come. Welcome back, Jeongyeon.” Jihyo said, while gently rubbing Jeongyeon’s back.

“Is Nayeon here?”

“Nayeon is at work.” Jihyo said. “But she called a while ago. Unfortunately, she forgot to bring her phone at work and asked me to bring it to her.”

“I see.”

“Actually, Sana and I are in a hurry to buy the groceries for the get together. We have a long long list to buy. So, how about you bring Nayeon’s phone to her instead?” Jihyo was obviously making things up to arrange the meeting of the two. The girls approved in unison.

“Okay.” Jeongyeon agreed and got Nayeon’s phone from Jihyo.

Jeongyeon thought it was a great excuse to talk to Nayeon since the incident.

*****

Jeongyeon decided to be strong, strong enough to risk being broken all over again and fight for the one she loved – Im Nayeon.

Jeongyeon knew heartbreak could shatter her mind and leave her soul feeling like a dust and her body unwilling to live again, but Nayeon was worthy of everything.

Jeongyeon drove her white Jaguar on the streets of Apgujeong-ro. She opened the purple iPhone that she gave to Nayeon and was happy to see the wallpaper. It was (still) them.

On the wallpaper, Jeongyeon was happily looking at Nayeon while Nayeon was smiling from ear to ear both holding the inception banner from ONCE.

Jeongyeon remembered it was Nayeon’s favorite picture of them since ONCE supported their ‘ship’. Nayeon even said that their smile on the picture was genuine because she felt they were not hiding from the closet every time they posed for the inception banner.

Jeongyeon parked her car and rushed inside the JYP Entertainment building.

She bolted the wide hallway like an Olympic Champion at the start gun until she could feel her heart throbbing inside her chest. She held to her knees trying to catch her breath when she arrived at Nayeon’s shooting location.

Jeongyeon held the door handle and slowly moved forward until the door swung open.

"Okay. Since you two have so much great chemistry on the screen, we will do the kissing scene for real." The director declared.

Jeongyeon saw Nayeon and Minhyuk were shocked by what the director said. Their reaction was subtle but not subtle enough for Jeongyeon not to notice.

Jeongyeon walked forward to the director’s area to have a better view of the two artists.

Jeongyeon honestly did not want Nayeon to do the scene, not because Minyuk wasn’t attractive or anything. In fact, the guy looked respectful and considerate, but because she thought of Nayeon.

Did Nayeon think of her before doing the scene? Was Nayeon comfortable with it? Was it okay with Nayeon or she just thought of doing it for the sake of people around them?

Jeongyeon noticed the two were exchanging whispers to each other until Nayeon saw her, with Nayeon’s iphone in her hand.

Jeongyeon knew what would take place was purely about work but she couldn’t help but felt dismayed.

"Okay! Both of you, be ready! Let's do the kissing scene in three two one. Action!" The director shouted.

Minhyuk looked directly into Nayeon’s eyes, his face was so close to her. Nayeon could probably smell the sweet fragrance coming from him. Minhyuk leaned in a little closer until their foreheads almost touched.

Nayeon sat frozen onto her seat and looked at Minhyuk.

Jeongyeon’s heart was beating faster, not sure if it was because she ran like an Olympic champion a while ago or because she would witness Nayeon kissing another person.

But knowing how professional Nayeon was, she would do what the director said.

Jeongyeon saw Nayeon closed her eyes in anticipation for Minhyuk’s kiss and Jeongyeon had to look away. She left the room immediately.

Jeongyeon’s eyes became glazed with glassy layers of tears.

As she walked to the main exit, her tears dripped from her eyes down to her cheeks. Until she bumped with Sadness Manager.

“Jeongyeon, what are you doing here? Why are you crying?” Jeongyeon didn’t say a word. She bit her lip tightly in an attempt to hide any sound that wanted to escape from her mount. She handed Nayeon’s phone to Sadness Manager and walked to her car.

Though there were things in life Jeongyeon wanted to give up on, Nayeon was never and would never be on her list.

But today, Jeongyeon felt defeated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Please come back  
> Do you still feel the same?  
> Have you still not forgiven me?  
> Have the scars I’ve given you  
> Not healed yet?  
> Or have you replaced me  
> With someone else?  
> Is there no place for me  
> In your heart anymore?
> 
> After I let you go  
> You don’t know how much I regretted  
> Come back to me, forgive me  
> Because that won’t ever happen again  
> I thought too easily  
> Of your love  
> Come back to me, back into my arms  
> -precious love


	12. when the battle is over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Good evening, Nayeon. This is Minhyuk. Do you have free time tomorrow?” 
> 
> "Yes, oppa. I’m done with my schedule for the week. Why?"
> 
> "I just want to ask, if you want to go out with me? Coffee?" 
> 
> “Sure, oppa. Let's meet up tomorrow." Nayeon hit send.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> agape  
> (n.) the highest form of love; selfless, sacrificial and unconditional love;

It was almost midnight when Nayeon arrived at the dorm.

“Unnie! You arrived just in time!” Chaeyoung shouted and made one seat available for Nayeon.

“Hi, everyone.” Nayeon greeted and all the girls replied in unison.

“How was the shoot, Unnie?”

“It was…okay. Very tiring actually.” Nayeon said, a memory of Jeongyeon standing behind the shoot flashed back into her mind.

“Did you meet Jeongyeon?” Sana asked and all the girls’ attention was glued to her.

“No. I didn’t see her.” Nayeon shook her head.

“What? She went here today looking for you and we told her you had a shoot today, so she went to the company. Did you get your phone, unnie?” Dahyun asked.

“Yes, I did.”

“But she was the one who brought your phone. How come you didn’t see her, unnie?” Tzuyu asked.

“Sadness Manager handed the phone to me.”

“And what did Sadness Manager say?” Momo asked.

“She…”

Another flashback came into Nayeon’s mind, this time it was Sadness Manager. Apparently, the manager told Nayeon about her encounter with Jeonyeon.

_“She was crying when I saw her. She didn’t say a word though. She just handed me your phone and left.”_

“Wait, stop bombarding me with so many questions. Aren’t we going to start the celebration? Coz really, I had a long day and I’m tired. No, actually, I’m going to bed now.”

“But we are about to call Mina now.” Jihyo said and started a video call with Mina.

Jihyo knew that the two were still not on good terms. The reason why she planned this get together was for the two to start talking with each other.

“Just… say hi for me.” Nayeon said and went inside the room.

Nayeon remembered Mina wanted to meet her before going to Japan but Nayeon simply declined. Thus, they never really had a chance to talk about the incident in Manila.

“Mitang! We really miss you!” Momo shouted. Their voices could still be heard by Nayeon through the slightly opened door.

“Did you see us at Soribada? Minayah, we got an award!” Sana said.

“I did. I saw all of you. Thank you, Sanayah. I really miss you guys too.”

“Nayeonunnie said hi. She was tired doing a shoot today, so she went to bed already.” Tyuzu said.

“I see. Please tell her I said hi too, Tyuzu.” Mina said and noticed Jeongyeon’s absence. “Where is Jeongyeonunnie?”

Everyone was silent.

“She… she has a schedule tomorrow with her sister. They’ll be going to the animal shelter to volunteer so she can’t make it today.” Jihyo explained.

_Jeongyeon has allergies to cats and dogs but still will volunteer at an animal shelter._

“Aish. Why do I keep on thinking about her?” Nayeon murmured to herself.

“I miss her cooking meals for us.” Tzuyu said.

“I miss that whenever she goes out, she’ll bring home our favorite snacks.” Sana said.

“I miss her cleaning the dorm whenever she can.” Dahyun said. “Do you guys remember? We were partying inside our room with the disco lights but Jeongyeonunnie was cleaning and partying at the same time.”

“Yes. And whenever she’s stressed out, she’ll just get the vacuum cleaner and broom broom!” Momo said and gestured her hand back and forth. “We can’t talk to her when she does that, very scary unnie.”

“Remember when she asked us about cleaning the vacuum cleaner?” Chaeyoung asked.

“Yes! And we called her the vacuum cleaner cleaner!” Jihyo said and everyone laughed in unison.

“I miss Jeongyeonunnie.” Mina said.

“We miss her too, Mitang. Very much.” Jihyo said.

Nayeon heard everything and carefully shut the door until she could not hear anything but silence.

She went inside the bathroom and stared at her reflection. She looked okay, in fact beautiful even. But inside, the ache for Jeongyeon gnawed at her very heart. Her heart still beat endlessly for Jeongyeon.

Nayeon would never understand why Jeongyeon left her, or how Jeongyeon left her. It was kind of confusing for her the way Jeongyeon just simply walked away that night.

She was missing Jeongyeon for three months now and whether admitting to herself or not, she would always sit by the window waiting for that white Jaguar to pull into their driveway. There were instants that she would flinch every time a white car passed by the window thinking it was Jeongyeon.

She opened her phone and tears started to gather behind her eyes the moment she saw the wallpaper. The ache of longing to be with Jeongyeon echoed through the very marrow of her bones. Nayeon never knew that missing Jeongyeon could take over every fiber of her being and wringed her out like a wet sponge every night.

No one knew about it and it was a torment Nayeon was not prepared for.

She closed her eyes, letting her mind fill with Jeongyeon’s voice. She could hear Jeongyeon teasing like she was just a few feet away. Nayeon’s mind was filled with witty retorts she would say.

Until suddenly her phone received a message.

_"Good evening, Nayeon. This is Minhyuk. Do you have free time tomorrow?”_

It took a while before Nayeon had the will to reply.

_"Yes, oppa. I’m done with my schedule for the week. Why?"_

_"I just want to ask, if you want to go out with me? Coffee?"_

_Caffe Americano, Jeongyeon’s favorite._

_“Sure, oppa. Let's meet up tomorrow."_ Nayeon hit send, thinking she needed to forget about the owner of the white Jaguar.

*****

Nayeon’s eyes scanned the coffee shop and Minhyuk waved in recognition. He raised his eyebrows in what Nayeon hoped was a signal of pleasant surprise for her appearance.

Nayeon stride towards Minyuk and took the seat in front of him.

Minhyuk was clad in a loose black t-shirt and jeans, all as perfect as the day they were purchased.

_Black t-shirt and jeans, Jeongyeon would look good on that too._

She could also detect the scent of exquisite cologne lingering from Minhyuk through the air.

_Jeongyeon’s scent is better, Creed’s Virgin Island Water – my favorite scent. The one we bought at Benefit San Francisco. Jeongyeon smells so good, she ranked #5 for idols who smelled good every time they passed by._

_Jeongyeon wasn’t a fan of changing perfume scents but she appreciated it when I bought a new perfume when we went to Switzerland to shoot TWICE TV5. She even said I smelled good._

“I’m sorry if we’re not allowed to go to other coffee shops aside from this one.” Minhyuk was seated with heavy awkwardness. He waited for Nayeon’s response but Nayeon wasn’t focusing on his words.

_That’s how nice Jeongyeon was, she always appreciated the small details about me._

It took a few seconds before Nayeon was able to respond. “It’s okay, oppa. It was convenient for me since it’s near our building.”

“Good to know, then. Let me order for us. Excuse me for a while.” Mihyuk said and went to the counter.

With nothing else to do, Nayeon let herself soaked in the ambient music inside the coffee shop while looking outside the glass window.

Her seat had a view of the entrance and two women going inside the shop caught her attention. Her eyes extensively scanned the two.

The two women intertwined their hands before ordering. They exchanged a doe-eyed look and failed to repress a grin on one face exactly mirrored by the other. They were obviously in love. Nayeon thought their “colors” were as bright as their smile for each other, making them stand-out no matter where they went.

_Do I and Jeongyeon look like that whenever we look at each other?_

“Sorry, it took me long.” Minyuk appeared while holding a tray of coffee and pastries.

“It’s okay, oppa. Thank you for the treat.”

“I hope you are enjoying our first date, Nayeon.” Minhyuk blurted out.

“Date?” Nayeon was shocked. She almost spewed her hazelnut latte.

“Yes, Nayeon. I wanted to see you coz I need to tell you something personal.”

“What is it?”

“I would like to formally court you.” Minhyuk said, causing Nayeon to cough.

“What? What did you just say?”

“I want to formally court you, Im Nayeon.” Mihnyuk said with conviction. “I have feelings for you from the day we first met at Music Bank, Nayeon. I was just too cowardly to make a move back then especially with the dating ban your company had set on you. I also knew you and… Yoo Jeongyeon were together back then. But yesterday, during our shoot, it came to my knowledge that you and Jeongyeon broke up. So, I thought this would be my chance on you now.”

Nayeon’s brain stuttered for a moment. Every part of her went on pause while her thoughts tried to catch up.

Minhyuk was too perfect. His smile was soft with a hint of femininity, his strong structure was all male. He was all about love, care and respect for Nayeon, her special girl. He could picture them already, holding hands while walking through the park like it seemed the most natural thing in the entire world.

“Okay.” Nayeon said involuntarily.

“Really? Yes!” Minhyuk punched his fist above his head. “Thank you, Nayeon. I promise to do my best to always bring a smile on your face. You’d be my number one.” Minhyuk promised and placed his hand over Nayeon’s.

_“You are number one. You are my number one. Always remember that, Nayeon.”_

Nayeon immediately withdrew her hand from Minhyuk upon hearing Jeongyeon’s voice, like she was burnt.

“Sorry, Minyuk. I just…”

“It’s okay. I’m sorry too. I should’ve asked permission before holding your hand.” Minhyuk smiled.

Minhyuk could see by Nayeon’s expression, there’s a lot going on in her head right now. So, he decided just to enjoy their food, looking around the busy streets of Cheongdam-dong. They didn’t speak during the moment because for Minhyuk, they already communicated.

*****

Aside from donating supplies for the shelter, Jeongyeon and Seungyeon volunteered in animal welfare yesterday with Blue Angel Volunteers and generously spent the whole day cleaning and giving bathes and medicines to the animals in need.

The sisters had been doing this for quite some time now, both having a soft spot for animals and especially when Bbosong, Jeongyeon’s beloved dog, passed away. But yesterday was a different story. Jeongyeon went to the animal shelter in hopes of forgetting what she saw the last time she visited JYP Entertainment building.

Jeongyeon felt completely calm today, her back laying on the couch and feeling herself sinking in the soft mattress while enjoying her caffe americano. Her heartbeat was a steady drum of a melody. In the distance she heard the busy streets of Seoul but far enough to bother her. She took her cell phone out and thought of updating the social media for ONCE.

Without a warning, a newsflash struck through Jeongyeon’s heart like a knife. She felt like a shiny metal had disappeared inside her and the black handle was pushing against her heart.

The news was from Dispatch. _"Im Nayeon of TWICE and Lee Minhyuk of BtoB were caught having a date after shooting their webs series.”_ The headline stated, with a photo of Nayeon and Mihyuk holding each other’s hand.

The pain radiated in Jeongyeon’s guts, she almost vomited her coffee. She felt jealousy starting to build up and she thought of exploding. She felt emotional. She had to re-read the article.

_“Im Nayeon of TWICE and Lee Minhyuk of BtoB were caught having a date after shooting their webs series.”_

She wanted to shout, throw the phone on her hands, kick everything on her eyesight, punch her knuckles on the wall like a mad man. She wanted to vent, let it all out.

It was so easy to be cruel in this moment and never mind the damage. But she didn’t. Jeongyeon would never be cruel. Instead she took a deep breath and embraced all the pain she felt inside her heart.

“Jeongyeon, I’m sorry about the news.”

“It’s… okay, Seungyeonuunie.” Jeongyeon found herself unable to mask the hurt.

“But coming from Dispatch, that could be false news, right? The two probably just went out to promote their web...”

“You know, Seungyeonuunie.” Jeongyeon cut in. “It’s very hard to see the person you love being happy with another person. I didn’t know it would hurt this fucking much. I wish I didn’t run away, I wish I didn’t turned my back at her, I wish I didn’t tried to escape.” Jeongyeon pounded her chest a few times as tears started to fall from her eyes.

“So, this is what they say about love, right? You’ll never realize how much a person means to you until they’re not with you anymore.“ Jeongyeon continued.

“But you did what you thought was right, Jeongyeon. You walked away because you loved and cared for not only one but for eight persons. You knew TWICE would disband if the world knew your relationship with Nayeon. You knew the girls’ dreams would be put into jeopardy once the news broke. This judgmental world would blame you and Nayeon and probably include the innocent girls in the scandal. They would blame Mina’s condition got worse because of your situation with her and Nayeon. It’s just that Nayeon didn’t see your sacrifices, Jeongyeon.”

Jeongyeon sighed and regained herself, “I wish Nayeon was here, to tell her the things I couldn’t tell, tell her that I love her, tell her that I’ll never forget about her, tell her that I’ll always see her in everything thing that I do and tell her that I miss her so much. But… Nayeon isn’t the type who will go out with a person unless she feels something for him. She finally found someone who's going to be accepted by the world, Seungyeonunnie. I would never be Minhyuk. And Nayeon deserves nothing but the best. I mean, I should be happy for her. Nayeon deserves to have everything.” Jeongyeon wiped her tears away.

“But what about your happiness, Jeongyeon?”

“It doesn’t matter, unnie. Maybe… this will make me happy in the future. Happiness comes after when the battle is over.”

For a moment Seungyeon wondered if Jeongyeon was confused. She could not blame her younger sibling for having clustered thoughts. Jeongyeon had not finished her coffee yet.

“But your happiness does matter to me.” Seungyeon stated but Jeongyeon kept her silence. It was painful to look at her.

Seungyeon understood Jeongyeon and Nayeon’s love was a sort of union of souls, a feeling that to lose the other would be worse than death. Whatever came, they knew they’d be there for one another.

Sure, Nayeon snored sometimes whenever she and Jeongyeon slept together, she spoke with her loud voice often and she sucked at playing games whenever Jeongyeon dragged her to play with her, but there would never be another. Jeongyeon would never look for another, she never wanted anyone else but Nayeon.

But Seungyeon knew there’s a deep-rooted part of Jeongyeon’s soul that understood the connection between self-sacrifice and love. Thus, even Nayeon was worth fighting for, Jeongyeon’s sacrifice was necessary and her time to be alone had come.

Jeongyeon had to say goodbye to the only person she felt love, to the only person that she felt happy with.

Nayeon was her past and she was not coming back.

This was goodbye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Even if it’s a dream, I like it  
> Tomorrow, I’ll be there  
> Even if you’re not  
> That’s okay, I’ll remember you  
> Little by little  
> Our memories piled up  
> I will always keep them  
> As they were
> 
> With my eyes only  
> I know it won’t pass onto you  
> So I’ll give back your heart  
> One by one”  
> -21:29


	13. ending scene

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I summoned Jeongyeon today to clarify some things about your relationship and she said yes, you two broke up and that it wouldn’t hinder your careers. She said she’s happy for you and that you deserve a man who will love you more than she did. She even said sorry. It was a bit awkward, you know? Like she was confessing to me.” Mr. Park chuckled while shaking his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> nakama  
> (n.) friends that are like family

Mina walked up to the door, dragging her luggage behind her. She raised her hand to use the doorbell. She heard the sound coming from the inside and someone rushed to get the door.

The door opened widely, and the girls warm and loving faces were revealed. Mina embraced them in a tight hug. She imagined what awaited her before coming back, a place of more love and warmth that she missed countless days from the time she was gone.

“Mitaaaaang! We missed you!” Sana shouted.

“Why didn’t you inform us you’d be back today?” Jihyo asked. “We could fetch you at the airport.”

“No one knew I’d be home except for Sadness Unnie. She assisted me from the airport to here. I kept it to myself because I thought of surprising you, guys.” Mina confessed. Her voice remained as warm as the early spring.

“We are surprised, Minaunnie. We missed you so much. Are you feeling all better now?” Chaeyoung asked.

“Yes, Chaeyoung. I’m all better now. Thanks to you, guys. I know I’ve caused so many troubles but because all of you reached out your hands to support me, I was able to return here again.”

“We can do this together, Mina. Just start slowly by doing what you can manage.” Jihyo said.

“We must celebrate today!” Momo said and the girls agreed in unison.

“Where’s Nayeonunnie and Jeongyeonunnie?” Mina noticed the missing unnies.

“Nayeonunnie has a photoshoot today for a magazine.” Tzuyu said.

“And Jeongyeonunnie still lives with her parents. She really doesn’t go here but we always get to see her during practices and schedules.” Dahyun explained.

“I see.” Mina said.

“So, what are we waiting for?! Let’s celebrate today! Finally, TWICE’s Black Swan!” Jihyo exclaimed.

Mina felt like a turtle retracting into her shell when she returned home. And before she knew it, Mina moved closer to the girls so that she could feel their presence, allowing her to stay lost in the moment a while longer.

For her, the girls’ loving presence was her sanctuary, and everything was happy again. It was love all around her again.

*****

In the quiet ambiance of the café, Nayeon and Minhyuk were seated in front of each other, their knees almost touching under the narrow coffee table that divides them.

Nayeon had finished her first solo magazine photoshoot with Nylon Korea when she received a message from Minhyuk, wanting to have dinner with her.

“So, how was your meeting with Mr. Park yesterday?” Minhyuk asked.

“It was…okay.” Nayeon mumbled while stirring her caffe americano.

“Did he get mad or something?”

Nayeon shook her head.

“Are you sure? You don’t look okay to me.”

“I’m sorry, Minhyuk. I’m just… tired from the photoshoot.” Nayeon said and forced a smile.

“Let’s just enjoy the food then I’ll drop you at your dorm.” Minhyuk said, understandingly.

“Thank you, Minyuk.” Nayeon said and a flashback of her meeting with Mr. Park entered in her mind.

_“Good afternoon, Mr. Park.” Nayeon greeted._

_“Nayeon, please take a seat.” Mr. Park gestured. “I saw the news from Dispatch recently. And based on the fans’ reaction,_ _majority_ _seem to have positive feedback with whatever you have with Minhyuk. Our email had been bombarded since the news came out. Your supporters want us to release a formal statement about it. Is it true, though? Your relationship with Mihyuk?”_

_“He’s courting me.”_

_“And? Are you going to say yes?”_

_Nayeon was not able to respond after a while._

_“_ _I..._ _Do we really need to release an official statement now? Can I think about it first?”_

_“So, it’s confirmed_ _then_ _? Your breakup with Yoo Jeongyeon?”_

_Nayeon was taken aback by the question Mr. Park Jin Young threw at her._

_“What does this have to do with_ her _, Mr. Park?” Nayeon couldn’t even say Jeongyeon’s name._

_“Coz, I just wanna make sure yours and Jeongyeon’s career, along with the girls’, will not be affected by your past relationship.”_

_“It will not, Mr. Park.” Nayeon said firmly._

_“Good. It’s mutual then. Jeongyeon said the same.”_

_“What?”_

_“I summoned Jeongyeon today to clarify some things about your relationship and she said yes, you two broke up and that it wouldn’t hinder your careers. She said she’s happy for you and that you deserve a man who will love you more than she did. She even said sorry. It was a bit awkward, you know? Like she was confessing to me.” Mr. Park chuckled_ _while shaking his head._

Suddenly, the music filled the café without any effort. The sound rushed in and around every person in the coffee shop.

Nayeon recognized the song as soon as the slow tempo of the piano started playing in the background – one of Jeongyeon’s favorite songs.

_Hello, it’s been a while…_

The music flew like it was the air Nayeon breathed. The music soared through her veins and swirled in her head. Eventually, she lost all sense of everything except for the music.

_…Make sure you eat well, because it’ll all pass_ _  
You’ll be able to sleep well like you did before  
I really mean it from the bottom of my heart  
You have the right to become happier…  
  
_

_…Don’t say those words, please_ _  
You know those words hurt me even more  
You said you would love me, so what is this?  
You don’t know what kind of heart you gave me…  
  
_

_…As much as you were lonely_ _  
I really hope you meet someone  
Who will love you more than yourself  
I’m sorry that’s not me  
It’s not easy to give…  
  
_

“Nayeon? Nayeon, are you okay?” Minhyuk asked worriedly. Nayeon blinked like she came back to reality, sitting in the coffee shop with Minhyuk.

_…she said she’s happy for you and that you deserve a man who will love you more than she did. She even said sorry…_

Mr. Park’s voice lingered in Nayeon’s mind.

“I… Ah… I’m so sorry, Minhyuk. I… I can’t do this anymore.”

“What? What do you mean?”

“I… I took it out on you, Minhyuk. My pain from Jeongyeon. You came at the right time when I was in pain from her and you were the safest target. A new relationship was the last thing I needed. I’m sorry. I am really sorry, Minhyuk. I’m sorry I wasn’t aware but now I am. I didn’t want to rebound on you, Minhyuk. You deserve something real. We can’t do this anymore.” Nayeon immediately stood up and got her bag.

“So, you still love Jeongyeon do you? That freaking dyke.” Minhyuk was irritated.

“What did you just say?”

“Why do you settle for someone less, Nayeon? For God sake, she’s a dyke.” Minhyuk held Nayeon’s hand. “Come on. This country will never accept your relationship with her, Nayeon. I’m better than her and I hope you can see that. The fans saw that, Nayeon. They loved us. We can be the Nation’s Couple. Don’t you want that? I’ll treat you better, be with me.”

Minhyuk was never less than arrogant and Nayeon never met anyone so wrong. But maybe everything he told Nayeon was right. But he’s also a terrible human being and Nayeon didn’t care if he’s right.

“Jeongyeon is trash for dumping someone like you. You cared for her and you loved her, and this was how she repaid you. She didn’t love you, Nayeon. You were nothing to her. Be with me.”

But Minhyuk was wrong this time, so wrong than an upside-down rainbow. Nayeon contemplated whether to slap him or not. For God sake, she’s been slapping people these days.

But Nayeon didn’t want to cause any troubles. So instead, Nayeon let go of Minhyuk’s grip and left.

*****

It was almost tomorrow when Nayeon arrived at the dorm. The light of the day had been replaced by the unrelenting blackness of the night inside the dorm.

Nayeon saw the aftermath of the party the girls organized for Mina. She knew Mina was home from the millions of text messages and chats she received from the girls informing her to come home immediately and celebrate with them.

Not that Nayeon didn’t want to celebrate with them, in fact she was happy to see Mina had returned. For she had forgiven Mina a long time ago and she let go of all the negative emotions and memories associated with Mina.

Nayeon sneaked her way to the kitchen and quietly opened the fridge to get some water.

“What the hell? Why’s my glasses inside the fridge again?” Nayeon murmured.

“Good evening, Nayeonunnie.”

“Omo, Mina. You scared me.” Nayeon said and held her chest.

“Sorry, unnie. I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s okay. So, um, how was your party, Mina? I’m sorry I wasn’t able to join you.”

“It’s okay, Unnie. I heard you did a photoshoot today.”

“Yes. I did.”

No words were spoken between Nayeon and Mina after the short conversation. Both didn’t know what to say anymore until the silence became awkward.

“I’m sorry, Nayeonunnie.”

“I’m sorry, Minari.”

Both said at the same time.

There was a long silence again.

“I’m sorry, Nayeonunnie. I’m sorry for what happened between us and Jeongyeonunnie. You were the best unnie that I ever had. You were like a family and I felt you were a real sister to me. You supported me, loved me and even made sure I was alright, but I made you feel miserable. So, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for all the things that I’ve caused you.”

“I’m sorry too, Mina. For slapping you and for deliberately ignoring your calls when you wanted to meet with me before leaving for Japan. I wasn’t ready to face you back then. I’m so sorry.”

In that moment, Nayeon and Mina rushed towards each other, both feeling sorry. They both hugged each other tight as if their embrace washed all the things that happened between them to nothing.

Though some thought saying sorry was meaningless or overused, for Nayeon and Mina sorry did fix their friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I want to hear it, will I be able to hear it  
> That we share the same feelings?  
> Something that I saw in my dreams, no  
> I shouldn’t expect for it
> 
> Overflowing with words I can’t say  
> My feelings collected with the number of times I prayed  
> If I close my eyes  
> I wonder if this distance can be reduced  
> Not being able to tell you how painful it is  
> I like you, I like you, even though it’s unbearable  
> The trace of your smile, for it to not disappear  
> Being beside you, you’re the only one”  
> -wishing


	14. Unconditionally

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeongyeon turned towards Nayeon. 
> 
> “I have imagined holding your hands so many times but now I find it difficult to do so, Nayeon. If I stay… if we stay, I’ll lose you more for sure. Things have changed so much, so fast, Nayeon. It’s time for us to end our story. I wish all the happiness for you even if that means I must sacrifice my own.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> retrovaille  
> (n.) the joy of meeting or finding someone again after a long separation;

It’s been a few days since Nayeon and Mina were back to normal.

And Mina decided to visit Jeongyeon for the first time after getting back from Japan.

“That smells good, unnie.” Mina said.

“Mina! You’re back!” Jeongyeon rushed towards Mina and gave her a tight squeeze. “I can’t believe you’re actually here! How are you? Are you all good?”

“I’m all good, unnie. Thank you for always keeping in touch while I was away.” Mina reciprocated the hug.

“I’m happy you’re back now, Mina. You surprised me.”

“The last time I saw you, you were doing the same thing, unnie.” Mina said after breaking the hug.

“Nope. I was baking chocolate chip cookies the last time you saw me. This time it’s double chocolate chip cookies.”

“I hope it will taste good.”

“Of course! I’ve been making cookies for so long I know what will make the best cookies. Even Nanan, Tan and Bam love my cooking and baking.” Jeongyeon boasted, smiling lopsidedly.

Jeongyeon was one of those people who could be easily read.

Jeongyeon mourned on the inside but she believed that she could hide her sorrow very well from everyone. But everyone could see it in her eyes and her movements. It’s just that no one dared to ask her, except for Mina.

“Aren’t you going back home?” Mina asked, referring to the dorm. “The girls are missing you. We all miss you, Jeongyeonunnie.”

Jeongyeon was taken aback by her question.

“I… Ah. I don’t think that’s a good idea, Mina.” Jeongyeon became serious.

“Why don’t you talk with Nayeonunnie?”

“What for, Mina? The last time I tried talking to her, she was on the verge of kissing another person. Let’s just let her be.”

“Why do you act like that, Jeongyeonunnie?”

“Act like what?”

“Like you don’t care for Nayeonunnie anymore when in fact we both know you still love her.”

“Not anymore, Mina. I’ve already decided. I think it’s important for me to not regret or look back on decisions I’ve already made. I can’t blame anyone for it. And besides, she’s already happy with someone else. I won’t ruin that for her.” Jeongyeon said firmly.

“But still. Talk to her, Jeongyeonunnie. Tell her all the things you want to say, at least, for the last time.”

Jeongyeon and Mina stare at each other in an odd way, as if they were having a silent argument.

Jeongyeon sighed, “Why are you so pushy?”

“Because I’m so competitive that I want to win this conversation.”

“Okay then. You win. I’ll talk to her. For you.”

“No. Do this for yourself and for Nayeonunnie.”

“Okay.” Jeongyeon promised.

*****

Nayeon had found herself sitting on the bench at Love line with the comforting presence of the night. It was strange for her, being here again after so long. But despite how long she’d been away, she still remembered everything about the place.

Out here the night was starless, and the moon was covered with murky clouds that blended in with the rest of the sky. Just enough lights from the city were visible on the horizon.

Nayeon liked the night like this because it let her feelings run free. She could do the things she would never be allowed to do when the sun was out. She could do whatever she wanted, so she cried. Crying felt good for Nayeon because they were tears that she didn’t want to push away, and they were temporary cleaners to wash away her pain.

_…she said she’s happy for you and that you deserve a man who will love you more than she did. She even said sorry…_

Words of Mr. Park still lingered in Nayeon’s mind and for the first time since the breakup, Nayeon admitted something to herself.

_“What you saw inside the comfort room in Manila was a misunderstanding, unnie. I… I almost punched the mirror and Jeongyeon was just trying to protect me.” Mina said after the reconciliation hug with Nayeon._

_“What?”_

_“Jeongyeon didn’t love me the way she loved you, unnie. She was just trying to protect me. She loved you, unnie. She still does.”_

_“I…” Nayeon was speechless._

_“I thought going to Japan would fix you and Jeongyeonunnie. But it was just me who got benefit from it.”_

_“No. Don’t say that, Mina. If there’s something I could ask for, it was your fast recovery.”_

_“But what about you and Jeongyeonuunie? I know you still love her too, unnie.” Mina could read her like an opened book._

_“I do, Mina. I really do. But I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m scared. I’m scared to get hurt and be broken again. I don’t want to be miserable anymore, but I can’t stop thinking about her. She never leaves my mind, she’s always there.” Nayeon pointed her chest. “and here.”_

_“Unnie, if there’s one thing I’ve learned from what has happened, it is to always take your chance. Especially if it’s about love. Talk to her, Nayeonunnie.”_

_“I want to, Mina._ _Seeing her during our schedules but n_ _ot_ _talking to_ _her for a long time had been tough_ _. B_ _ut I’m scared to_ _talk to_ _her because it may bring back those heartaches I tried to hide deep in myself.”_

_“You will never know unless you give it a shot, Nayeonunnie.”_

Nayeon contemplated whether to call or send a message to Jeongyeon. She held her phone, her purple iphone that she would always carry around, secretly waiting to hear from Jeongyeon.

Nayeon reminisced about it all. Not just the text messages, voice memos and calls for each other and the way she pressed her ear against the phone to hear Jeongyeon’s voice, but also the millions of pictures that could tell their story.

Nayeon dialed the only number she knew and memorized by heart.

“Hello? Nayeon?” Nayeon’s heart skipped a beat upon hearing the familiar voice.

“Hi. I… ah…” Nayeon cleared her throat. “I just want to ask if… um, we can meet tomorrow?”

There was a long silent pause before Jeongyeon was able to answer.

“Okay. What time?”

“Is morning good for you?”

“Sure. No problem.”

“Okay. See you then, Jeongyeon.”

“See you tomorrow, _Nayeonunnie_.” Jeongyeon ended the call.

“ _Nayeonunnie_? Really, Yoo Jeongyeon?” Nayeon said while looking at her phone.

Nayeon stared up at the starless sky once more and continued to let her mind run away for the moment.

*****

Nayeon never left Jeongyeon’s mind after the brief phone call they had last night.

Nayeon had found herself sitting on the bench at Love line once again. But this time, Jeongyeon was seated right next to her.

It was a strange feeling for Jeongyeon, being seated with Nayeon again after a long time of being strangers with each other.

In all the silence of their slightly opened lips, both their hearts were desperately pleading to just say what was needed to be said.

“How are you, Nayeon?” Jeongyeon was the first one to break the deafening silence.

“I’m… good. You?”

“Same. I’ve been busy baking and going to the animal shelter with Seungyeonunnie.” Jeongyeon cleared her throat. “Actually, I was pleased to receive your call last night. I was planning to do the same thing.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I just want to talk to you for the last time about…us.”

“What do you mean?”

“I just want to formally end what’s between us, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon paused. “I’m sorry it took me a while to talk to you. I’ve finally realized that I would never be the person you wanted me to be. I loved you. I wanted to be the very best for you, but I guess I wasn’t the right person you needed. Maybe that’s what hurts the most.” Jeongyeon sighed.

“But I’m okay with it. Minhyuk is better than me. And I'm so happy, genuinely happy, that finally you found the right person for you, Nayeon. Coz you deserve all the happiness this world can offer. You really do, Nayeon. I’m sorry for all the hardships I’ve done to you and I’m sorry for not giving the best of me. I’m sorry if I’m not enough.”

Nayeon was tongue-tied. She didn’t expect this conversation to drift this way.

“Well, I have to go now. Thank you for everything, Nayeon.” Jeongyeon stood up and took a few steps away from Nayeon.

“Hajima!” Nayeon shouted which prompted Jeongyeon to halt, her back still on Nayeon.

“You’re a coward, Yoo Jeongyeon!” Nayeon paused. “You’re a coward!”

“A coward that I should hate... I should hate you... I should be angry with you but… I can’t... I can’t, Yoo Jeongyeon. No matter how much I tried not thinking about you, you’re always in my mind. It’s always been you, You Jeongyeon. You don’t know how much I regret letting you go.”

For Nayeon, Jeongyeon was her stability in a world filled with chaos. It was just incomprehensible to lose that one thing she desperately needed in her life after realizing the sacrifices Jeongyeon did for her and the girls.

Jeongyeon turned towards Nayeon. “I have imagined holding your hands so many times but now I find it difficult to do so, Nayeon. If I stay… if we stay, I’ll lose you more for sure. Things have changed so much, so fast, Nayeon. It’s time for us to end our story. I wish all the happiness for you even if that means I must sacrifice my own.”

“I’m sorry if it took me a while to realize your sacrifices for us and for the girls, Jeongyeon. I really do. I can never hope to win you back and I don’t deserve you, but every day I pray that you’ll be back to me, that you will never turn your back to those wonderful years we shared.” Nayeon sobbed. “I understand now, the world does not need to know about us because the love that I see in your eyes is enough for me to know that you love and value me. And I still love you unconditionally, Yoo Jeongyeon.”

Nayeon fixed her gaze to Jeongyeon, the love of her life standing in the reflection of her eyes. She tried her best to convey what she wanted to say.

It was like an elongated eye contact that demanded a degree of physical contact and Jeongyeon understood.

Lost for words, Jeongyeon rushed towards Nayeon.

Without any hesitation, Jeongyeon leaned in and kissed Nayeon’s lips. Nayeon pulled Jeongyeon closer until she could feel the beating of Jeongyeon’s heart against her chest.

“I love you too, Im Nayeon.” Jeongyeon said after breaking the kiss, their foreheads touching. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

Jeongyeon wrapped her arms around Nayeon and Nayeon rested her head on Jeongyeon’s chest.

Nayeon missed this. Jeongyeon’s scent and her arms wrapped around her. Nayeon had to squeeze her back to check if Jeongyeon was really there with her. And Jeongyeon was, body and soul. In that simple moment, all their doubts stopped.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon were born to love each other even though some of their steps towards their love line caused them pain.

What they had realized was that all courage and understanding were necessary to walk on their love line, no matter the roughness, no matter the hardships.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Far down the distant path  
> Is a place we’re heading for  
> I wonder what the world  
> Looks like from there  
> My feet feel a little weak with anxiety  
> But you’ll hear it  
> If you listen carefully  
> The warm voice that cheers me up
> 
> Because you were here right next to me  
> I could walk without hesitation  
> Even the never ending sorrow is not frightening  
> If we hold our hands and hope  
> Let us bring our hearts together, be as one”  
> -be as one


	15. celebration of love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aeonian  
> (n.) eternal or everlasting

Nayeon was standing outside their dorm while waiting for Jeongyeon, Dahyun and Chaeyoung to arrive.

After some minutes, a white Jaguar pulled into their driveway and Nayeon immediately went to the driver side.

“Yah! I can’t see a thing!” Jeongyeon said after Nayeon covered her eyes with a folded handkerchief.

“Coz you’re not supposed to see anything, paboyah!” Nayeon shouted.

“Careful with your steps, unnie. We’re almost inside the dorm.” Dahyun said while assisting her unnie.

“What is this all about? Are you guys trying to kidnap me or something?” Jeongyeon said while spreading her hands in front.

“Calm yourself, Yoo Jeongyeon. Take a step, please.” Nayeon commanded.

Nayeon, Jeongyeon, Dahyun and Chaeyoung were now inside the dorm.

“Wait here. Wait for my signal before removing your cover. Don’t make any unnecessary movements, okay!” Nayeon said and they all left Jeongyeon near the door.

“Yes, _Nayeonunnie_.” Jeongyeon teased.

“Okay, you can remove your cover now!” Nayeon commanded and Jeongyeon obliged.

“Happy 10th Anniversary!” Nayeon and the girls shouted while twisting their party poppers.

The dorm’s living room underwent a whole transformation.

The ceiling was filled with red balloons, the ceiling itself couldn’t be seen at all. Rose petals were all over the floor like fallen leaves in the park during autumn season.

‘Happy 10th anniversary’ metallic letter balloons were meticulously posted on the wall. And the wall next to it was filled with fairy lights and pictures of Nayeon and Jeongyeon through the years, including pictures with the girls.

In the center of the living room was a beautifully designed long table filled with scrumptious food.

Nayeon saw the surprise on Jeongyeon’s face before she could hide it. A small smile played on Jeongyeon’s lips. This feeling was so familiar for Jeongyeon. She remembered the birthday surprise Nayeon gave to her.

This was overwhelming yet made her feel complete. This felt as though her heart was dancing around her chest and the hole inside her heart had been finally filled up.

Nayeon went closer and wrapped her arms around Jeongyeon’s neck.

“Happy anniversary, baby.” Nayeon said and pecked Jeongyeon on the lips.

“Yah. The girls are watching us.” Jeongyeon, even though obviously liking the kiss, wiped her lips.

“Yah! Don’t wipe it.” Nayeon smacked her shoulders.

“Why won’t I? I don’t want to kiss the lips that Minhyuk had kissed before.” There was a hint of jealousy in Jeongyeon’s voice.

“What? You rushed and kissed me at the love line. Remember your I love you too, Im Nayeon?” Nayeon was teasing.

“That was just a spur of the moment.”

“You haven’t changed at all, Yoo Jeongyeon. Always blocking me when I try to be sweet and all. Nevermind, Minyuk never kissed me.”

“What? I saw you during the shoot.”

“For your information, the kiss never landed, Yoo Jeongyeon. The director told us to kiss initially to bring out the emotion that was needed for the scene. But the director shouted cut right before the kiss. Sadness Manager took care of it before the shoot. I looked for you, but you disappeared.” Nayeon clarified.

“What? Really? But how about during your coffee dates?”

“No! I would never kiss that jerk, paboyah.” Nayeon rolled her eyes and smacked Jeongyeon’s shoulders.

“Ehem! Ehem! Happy anniversary, love birds!” Jihyo greeted, disturbing the two.

“Sorry about that.” Jeongyeon cleared her throat. “Thank you, Jihyo. Thank you, girls. I didn’t think Nayeon would drag all of you to prepare all of these.”

“Yah!” A slap came from Nayeon again. “I did not drag them to do this. They wanted to celebrate with us. It was Jihyo’s idea to celebrate our anniversary here.”

“Really? Are you the president of 2yeon club now?” Jeongyeon asked Jihyo.

“It depends on the salary.” Jihyo said and all the girls laughed.

“Let’s eat already. I’m hungry.” Momo said and all the girls went to the table.

After the feast, Nayeon stood up to make an announcement.

“Good evening everyone and thank you for coming to our anniversary party.” Nayeon cleared her throat. “First of all, I would like to say thank you for helping me for the set up today. Especially to Dahyun and Chaeyoung for dragging Jeongyeon for a shopping trip so that we could set up here. And of course, to Jihyo, who insisted on celebrating my and Jeongyeon’s anniversary with all the members. And to Sana and Tzuyu for the decoration ideas and actually making them. And lastly, to Momo and Mina for helping me in the kitchen. All your help and support mean a lot to me. Thank you, girls, for your understanding, for your love, for your support, for your patience when I and Jeongyeon were going through difficulties. I was scared but you guys, especially Mina, gave me the strength and courage to do what was needed to do. So, thank you, everyone.” Nayeon paused.

“And, of course, I would like to say thank you to Yoo Jeongyeon, for giving me another chance to love a person like you. I will always thank the universe for giving me someone like you because you are the most wonderful thing that has happened to me. I have learned about what really matters and that’s you, Yoo Jeongyeon. You are my best friend and as cheesy as it sounds, you are my one and only love. I will always be yours no matter what the world turns out to be.” Nayeon said and the girls squealed in disgust.

“Yah! You guys never treated me like a real unnie! I’m the oldest member!” Nayeo shouted, which prompted Dahyun to cover her ears. “Anyway, I would like to give a gift to all of you. Like a memento from this celebration.” Nayeon sand and the girls squealed, this time, in enthusiasm.

Nayeon got her paper bag and handed the girls a small pandora box. Inside of it was a silver ring.

“That is our TWICE’s couple ring. Always wear them and keep them safe. I love all of you!”

“Thank you, Nayeonunnie!”

“And for the last part of my speech, aside from the TWICE couple ring, I would like to give Yoo Jeongyeon a very special gift for this occasion.”

Nayeon pulled out from her paper bag what seemed to be rolled paper and hit it to Jeongyeon’s head.

“Ouch! What’s that for?!” Jeongyeon said while holding her head and getting the rolled paper from Nayeon. “What’s this?”

“An anniversary present.” Nayeon said eagerly. “Come on, open it! Open it! Pali pali!”

“Okay. Okay.” Jeongyeon said and looked at the rolled paper smiling.

It was a plain white rolled paper inserted in a white gold Cartier love ring. Attached with it was a red tag. Jeongyeon read it, “My heart is stuck on Yoo.”

Jeongyeon laughed. “You know, you don’t have any originally for doing the same thing I did to you before.”

“Why? You made my heart burst when you did that to me, so I did the same thing, hoping to make your heart burst too.” Nayeon confessed.

“Okay. Okay.” Jeongyeon agreed and wore the silver ring. She started reading the white paper.

Lo-love me baby  
Love me baby  
Lo-love me baby  
Love me baby  
  
Something was strange from the start  
Your eyes were special, I kept looking at you  
I tried to act chic but I kept stealing glances at you  
Without even knowing, what’s wrong with me?  
  
I try to act like I’m not interested  
But I hear you, I hear your voice  
I feel you from my head to my toes  
I feel your scent, I feel your scent  
  
No matter how much I think about it  
I want you  
Whoever I saw, I didn’t feel much  
But you’re different  
You make all of me stop  
  
I can’t do what I want  
I only want to see you  
Your face keeps flickering before me  
I’m stuck on you, stuck on you  
  
My eyes want to see you  
My heart remembers all of you  
24/7 I wanna be with you  
I’m stuck on you  
Already my heart is stuck on you  
Already my heart is stuck on you  
  
What’s on your mind? I can’t figure it out  
What’re you thinking of? I’m curious about everything  
My heart (Knock knock) Knocking on my heart  
You shake up my head, you shake up all of me  
  
All day, I’m drawing you out, every day, even now  
Will I be okay like this?  
Whatever I do, I think of you  
My thoughts have stopped on you  
  
No matter how much I think about it  
I want you  
Whoever I saw, I didn’t feel much  
But you’re different  
You make all of me stop  
  
I can’t do what I want  
I only want to see you  
Your face keeps flickering before me  
I’m stuck on you, stuck on you  
  
My eyes want to see you  
My heart remembers all of you  
24/7 I wanna be with you  
I’m stuck on you  
Already my heart is stuck on you  
I’m stuck on you  
  
Stuck on you  
  
Even if this is a dream  
I don’t wanna wake up  
Even if you don’t know me  
It’s alright, I like this  
I like liking you  
I can’t do what I want, I only want to see you  
  
I can’t do what I want  
I only want to see you  
Your face keeps flickering before me  
I’m stuck on you, stuck on you  
  
My eyes want to see you  
My heart remembers all of you  
24/7 I wanna be with you  
I’m stuck on you  
Already my heart is stuck on you  
I’m stuck on you  
  
Stuck on you

“This is the second time you wrote a song for me.” Jeongyeon looked at Nayeon. “This is beautiful, Nayeon. Why do you love someone like me?” Jeongyeon whispered.

“How could I not?” Nayeon replied, cupping the small face of Jeongyeon so her beautiful eyes connect with Nayeon’s. “You are my other half. I won’t think twice, I will hand you my heart a million times. No matter where life takes us, you have my heart, Yoo Jeongyeon.”

Nayeon loved the fading sunset behind Jeongyeon’s eyes and the moonlight that danced through her short hair. Nayeon loved Jeongyeon, not just the parts that made sense, not just the parts that she showed her but all of her.

“It was frightening to ever think of living without you, Nayeon. I couldn’t imagine us being complete strangers after the breakup. It scared me. So, thank you, Nayeon. Thank you for loving someone like me. I know we're still young and most people would consider me to be foolish and naïve but it’s true when I say that I love you more than I could ever love myself. Saranghaeyo, Im Nayeon.” Jeongyeon said and hugged Nayeon. Her words were like vanilla pudding, sweet and warm in their extraordinary sort of ways.

Jeongyeon stroked Nayeon’s hair and pulled her closer into her chest. Jeongyeon’s body was so familiar to Nayeon. Even the sound of her heart beating. The warmth of being with her and being happy made Nayeon want to squeeze even more.

And just like the first time, Nayeon and Jeongyeon had everything they wanted and needed right there. This was the love they waited for and prayed for.

Nayeon and Jeongyeon’s anniversary was a celebration of love, love for each other and all those important people surrounding them – TWICE. It was a day of reaffirming that their love for each other would last forever.

***end***

Thank you for reading!

Always remember that you are made of good things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.
> 
> -Maya Angelou.


End file.
